Black Holes and Revelations
by starvingartist83
Summary: When all is well in the world and Megamind's biggest worry is how to go about popping the question to the woman of his dreams, our hero learns that inconveniences from the past don't just vanish on their own.
1. Chapter 1

Prologue

Citizens of Metro City, as you can see this dull black void in the universe is pulling us closer and we're completely defenceless against it. Megamind...my Megamind...this planet's last hope is gone. This black hole or vortex or whatever it's called has been slowly destroying everything it's come across for thirty-five years and now it's reached our little corner of the universe. Metro City...Metrosity...this is Roxanne Ritchie reporting for the last time on...on the...on the death of Megamind...and the end of the world. Back to you Chris.

Chapter 1

Roxanne glared at her boss, Carl, across his desk. He looked fairly unimpressed by her bad mood, sitting back in his chair with his bored expression clearly stating he had heard all of this before many times over the years.

"You can't be serious. You're giving the story to _him_?" She demanded. "This is a local story and we agreed that I cover local news! I bring in 90% of your ratings and you damn well know it. What the hell?" Chris held up his hand.

"Harry Newman is a perfectly capable reporter and..."

"Harry Newman is an incompetent ass, and that's exactly why you made him a foreign correspondent. To get him the hell _out_ of Metro City. He's been reporting on the Himalayan Yak Festival for two years now not bothering anyone and now you've brought him in to do _my_ job?" Carl stared at her flatly, quietly thinking that this woman would be adding to his collection of grey hairs during the span of her career.

"Are you finished?" he asked. Roxanne took a deep breath but couldn't think of anything else to say for the moment.

"Yes."

"Okay. If you want the truth then here it is: we've brought him in to take some of your workload."

"My workload is fine."

"Let me finish." He snapped, showing the first signs of irritation since she had started her rant. "We've brought him in to take over _particular_ stories. Stories involving a certain former evil genius." Roxanne was speechless. "You're an amazing reporter Roxy. You're the best we've got and the viewers love you, but let's face it, half of your workload is reporting on what your boyfriend is up to. And considering that boyfriend spent the first half of his career trying to kill your _ex_ boyfriend...well it makes the public a little uncomfortable."

"Metro Man and I were never together. And he's not dead. You know that." Roxanne protested.

"But _they_ don't." Carl gestured out the window at the cityscape behind him. Roxanne sighed.

"How's this going to work then?" she asked.

"You both do local news. He does the stories about Megamind. You do some overseas pieces to pick up the slack."

"I want to pick which ones. I am _not_ doing the Yak festival." She said.

"Deal. Actually there's one I wanted to send you for next week. Some boffins over in Switzerland are predicting the end of the universe."

"Again?" she asked. He shrugged.

"I guess. You're in a four-star hotel all expenses paid for the weekend. Maybe you could even take Megamind." It was a peace offering and they both knew it. Roxanne knew when to back down.

"All right. I'll go along with it. But Newman had better lift his game. He still thinks Megamind's name is MegaMan." She warned. Carl flinched and sighed.

"I know, I know. Send the new intern in on your way out. I need aspirin." He closed his eyes and rubbed his forehead. Roxanne nodded and left without any more protests. More overseas trips and a weekend away? It wasn't a bad compromise for doing less work.

Sometimes it was good being Roxanne Ritchie.

"Hello? Hello Minion?" Megamind sat in front of his webcam and giant monitor while Skype set itself up. He insisted Minion check in every second day at 6pm to make sure he was all right and that the upgraded robot suit was functioning normally, but really he just wanted to see his friend. These days with Minion visiting his girlfriend in Japan every few weeks he missed the fish more than he cared to admit.

"Right here sir!" Minion's voice came through the speakers. Sure enough there the fish was wearing the robotic gorilla suit up there on the screen. Megamind couldn't keep the grin from his face.

"Minion! How's the trip?" he asked. Minion was smiling that dopey, toothy grin that had first appeared shortly after he and Shiyounin had began their long-distance relationship.

"It's great so far. Shiyounin's coming back with me this time, I hope that's okay. We'll be back in a week or so."

"It's fine Minion, really." When Shiyounin stayed over they spent most of their at-home-time outside in the newly installed pond, which was a bonus. Despite New Not Evil Lair being quite large Minion had developed an amazing knack for walking in on Roxanne and himself at exactly the wrong moment time and again. They had now agreed on designated intimacy-free zones and a knock twice before entry policy (Roxanne was not informed of these; she was under the impression that Minion's timing was simply getting better) Minion grinned.

"Thankyou sir. We'll have a surprise for you when we get there." Megamind grinned. He loved surprises.

{{Checking up on us, Megamind?}} a feminine voice came over the speakers speaking Japanese.

{{Always, Miss Shiyounin.}} he answered. Shiyounin giggled. After being a minion to her own evil overlord (one who was nowhere near as nice as Megamind was) she loved the way he spoke to her. {{How's the language barrier coming along?}}

"Not bad Mega Mind. I can understand if speak is slowly and talking is getting easier."

"That's great. How about you Minion?"

"It's getting there." He replied.

{{He declared war on Hungary at dinner last night.}} Shinyounin chimed in. Minion turned and glared at her.

"I told you not to tell him!" she giggled again. Megamind shook his head. Being an alien himself his tolerance for 'weird' was pretty high but lovers' quarrels between two fish was something new. They made small talk for a while longer and then he ended the call. He looked at the clock in the corner of his screen. It was seven o'clock. Roxanne should be home by now but there was no sign of her on his advanced-warning security system. After glancing at the monitors one more time just to make sure he was alone he walked over to his hidden safe (installed into one of his blinking beeping dial-covered machines bought from Romania) and opened it. There was a little black velvet box sitting inside. He took it in his hand and opened it up.

The ring was white gold and fairly simple in design. He had compressed the diamond himself in his lab (Roxanne had told him she preferred created over 'blood diamonds') and handed it over to a designer in the city to make something pretty out of it. It was attractive enough and from what Minion had told him before he left for Japan the 'rock' was more than impressive. It sparkled like a little star against the black velvet. He had been waiting a few weeks for the right time to surprise her with it (and the accompanying marriage proposal) but the timing had never seemed right. He tried when they went out to dinner but the waiter was always hanging around, or one or the other of them may have had too much wine and were giggling, or his nerves would simply get the better of him and he'd decide to postpone it, or they would wind up in a tangle of body parts in the back seat of the invisible car and then the timing would just be inappropriate. Once he had blurted out 'marry me!' while she had her head in his lap in the drivers' seat. He realised what he'd said and bit his lip but she had merely giggled and looked up at him.

"It's that good huh?" she teased, and went back to her activity (he wasn't complaining).

"Um...mmhmm." he'd clumsily answered. Neither had mentioned it since.

He hoped for a 'yes' next time rather than a giggle. He was fairly sure it would be a 'yes'. They were living together after all and the way she spoke of the future always included him.

If it was a 'no' he would probably throw himself off the cliff out the back of New Not Evil Lair. And just his damned luck the brainbots would save him...

Tonight Roxanne was coming home from work. The plan was to order Chinese and watch a DVD together. Megamind decided, tonight was the night. He would wait until they were cuddled up on the couch, catch her gaze and propose right there on the spot. It was simple, so simple nothing could go wrong.

On cue, Roxanne pulled up into the driveway in her car.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Megamind casually made sure he was around the front door when she came inside.

"Roxanne! I didn't hear you pull up!" he lied. He hugged her and she melted into his arms. "How was your day?"

"Don't get me started. Do we have any wine? I need wine." Hmm. Bad day. This could put a dampener on things...

"Of course. Why don't you come and have a seat in the kitchen and I'll pour you some? I was thinking Chinese for dinner, is that okay?"

"That'd be great. I'm starving, I haven't eaten all day." Hmm. Cranky tired hungry and possibly soon to be drunk Roxanne...maybe the proposal wasn't going to happen tonight after all.

Megamind poured her a glass of white and listened to her complain about Harry Newman (not a new thing) and her boss effectively banning her from doing news stories on him anymore because she made the public 'uncomfortable'. The whole thing confused him. Then she took a gulp and told him about the news story and trip to Switzerland next week and he choked on his own wine.

"Seriously? You're going there?"

"_We're_ going there. The booking is for two and we're paid up for the weekend." Megamind grinned.

"Switzerland! The Hadron Collider! I've wanted to see that for years! Are we really going?" he jumped up and down excitedly. Roxanne raised an eyebrow.

"I'm trying to tell you about my bad day here."

"You've just been given an all expenses paid weekend in Switzerland and you consider this a bad day? Snow! Chocolate! Examining the fabric of the universe..."

"Nerd." She teased, but he had a point. And now he was standing behind her rubbing her shoulders in that way that made her melt into a puddle of Roxanne-goo. "Mmmm okay maybe it wasn't such a bad day."

"And it's about to get better! Chinese food and DVDs!" he ran off to find the menu and phone.

"Order me something with shrimp? Oh and noodles, lots of noodles!" she asked as she forced herself to get up and go to the bedroom to get changed. Her jacket, skirt and heels were not good DVD/snuggle clothes.

Once she was gone Megamind ordered their food and snuck a quick look at the sparkly diamond ring again. Yep. Tonight was the night!

Not long later the night was progressing perfectly. The delivery man knew from experience to make it quick (he'd been given a brief tour of the alligator enclosure the first and last time he'd been late; Roxanne did not know about this) and after downing an obscene amount of Chinese food Megamind had Roxanne right where he wanted her, curled into him on the sofa watching Shutter Island, nice and relaxed from the wine and comfy in a pair of black tights and a baggy sweater. He fidgeted with the ring in the pocket of his jeans and was now working on subtly catching her gaze so he could pop the question.

It wasn't working. Roxanne was watching the screen intently. Why the hell did he have to pick such a good movie? He sighed and gave up for the night. He could almost hear Minion's voice saying "Will you just _do it_ already?"

As the credits rolled they chatted about the movie for a while. The conversation grew more general and Roxanne was giving him certain looks and hints that said tonight wasn't going to be a total loss. He drew her into a deep kiss and happily stroked her short silky hair while her hands slowly made their way under his shirt.

And then it happened. Just as he was tugging her sweater over her head and was ready to dive face-first between her breasts; the doorbell rang.

"What the..." Roxanne looked to him as though he'd know what was happening. He shrugged and used the remote control to switch the television back to the security cameras. It was raining outside. There was a dark figure on the front doorstep in a big coat and hat. He didn't look overly threatening, but then again it was...11 at night.

The local criminal element knew it was a bad idea to come to his house. He was on a first-name basis with most of them and he had warned all of his old prison buddies, even his adopted 'uncles' as he called them, that if he caught them misbehaving they would suffer consequences. No one else he knew would want to disturb him at this time of night, and Minion was in Japan.

"I'll go." He said as he got up, whistled, and was instantly flanked by four brainbots. He wouldn't need his de-gun for this. Even in his every day clothes (black and grey long-sleeved t-shirt and skinny jeans) most people found him intimidating. Now, interrupted part-way into a make-out session with his girlfriend his expression alone should send this fool running away.

He stalked down to the front door and threw it open.

"Whatever you want it had better be important." He said to the tall figure in front of him. The man said nothing for a few moments, then shifted awkwardly from foot to foot.

"Um...hey little buddy. Just thought I'd drop by and say 'hi'. So...hi. How's it going?" said the artist formerly known as Metro Man.

"You've got to be kidding me." Megamind said. Metro Man ran adjusted his hat.

"Is this a bad time? I know it's been a while...I can go if you want me to." He looked up at the rain expressing very little desire to actually leave. Megamind stared at him for a few seconds and sighed, wishing (not for the first time) that he was still evil. The old Megamind would have cast the man back out into the cold, wet night without a second thought.

"Come on in." He said and stood aside for the huge man.

Quickly, giving him no time to change his mind, Metro Man brushed past him inside, handing him his coat and hat as he went.

"Is Roxy still up?" he asked as he went. Megamind glared down at the wet items in his arms and handed them to the hovering brainbots to hang up.

"In the lounge. Make yourself at home." He made no attempt to keep the sarcasm out of his voice. Megamind changed his mind. Roxanne was right. This was a bad day. A very, very bad day.

Meanwhile Roxanne had pulled her clothes back into position just in time for the long-haired and bearded Metro Man to come walking into their lounge. She gasped but didn't scream this time.

"Hey Roxy." He said with a nervous smile. She jumped off the couch and glared at him.

"You! What are you doing here? We haven't heard from you in months!"

"Well I added you on Facebook...you mustn't have gotten the request." He mumbled.

"I did. I ignored you." She stated. Metro Man didn't blame her really. He did kinda leave her in the lurch during the whole Titan incident. Megamind came back into the room and flicked on the lights, mourning the loss of the nice cosy moment on the couch that was now lost and gone forever.

"Have a seat, Metro Man." He said, gesturing at an empty chair. The sooner they had his story the sooner they could get rid of him and go to bed.

Ignoring the empty seat he sat down on the still-warm sofa and sighed.

"I think you of all people should call me Wayne, little buddy." Megamind frowned and mentally tried it out. Waine. Wane. Way-en...

"Well, Wayen, I think we'd both like to know why you're here tonight." He sat down in the empty chair, two brainbots still hovering protectively behind him. Bitey, Roxanne's favourite, was hovering behind her. Roxanne perched on the arm of Megamind's chair and he felt a warm rush run through him. _Yes, Metro Man, she's with me! _He mentally gloated as he rested a hand on her waist.

"What, can't a guy come and visit some old pals once in a while without being interrogated?" he laughed and wrung his hands. Megamind and Roxanne both looked at him with identical expressions, flat stares each with one eyebrow raised. He sighed. "All right all right. Honest? Life as a rock star isn't all I thought it would be." They were still both staring at him. _Star?_ Megamind thought to himself. That was a slight exaggeration. They all knew his only album never got past number 72 in the charts. He continued. "The fame you know, never getting any privacy, the photographers, the groupies...all that." They were still giving him that stare.

He cracked.

"All right! My album bombed, my tour got cancelled and my fan club all deserted me for some guy named Altyan Childs in Austria...Afghanistan... someplace like that. I don't know." He buried his face in his hands. "No one likes my music. No one buys my albums, and you two are the closest thing I have to friends left. Anyone who cared about me from before thinks I'm dead, and none of them really cared about _Wayne_. They loved Metro Man. No one loves Music Man. And my hideout is just a reminder of all that." Megamind felt his face soften and he shared a glance with Roxanne. He knew true wretchedness when he saw it.

Roxanne didn't.

"Wow. You couldn't see that coming? Fancy no one loving you, the man who doomed an entire city to destruction and death at the hands of not one but _two_ villains he was perfectly capable of stopping!" Megamind grabbed her arm as she jumped off the arm of his chair and went to pick up the lamp from behind them. This was _their_ stuff and he was not going to let her smash it all to pieces on Metro Man's...Wayne's...head. She tried to pull away from his grasp but paused when she saw the look on his face. She sat back down.

"I get it. I do. I'm sorry I bothered you." Metro Man got up to leave. The evil part of Megamind clapped and cheered.

_Yes! He's leaving!_ It said. Unfortunately the good part was in control now.

"Wayen. Wait. It's late, do you want to stay here tonight?" Roxanne's eyes were wide and furious. Metro Man perked up.

"Really? Wow that'd be great. You know we never really had a chance to bond, you and me, and Roxy we've got heaps of catching up to do. And Minion...where's fish-dude?"

"In Japan with his girlfriend." Megamind said.

"Okay...sure why not." Wayne said.

"You can stay in his room. He keeps it clean. And he sleeps standing up so he's never used his bed." Megamind kept going, ignoring the telepathic daggers Roxanne was trying to drive into his head with her brain. Wayne grinned.

"Thanks. I appreciate it, this means a lot. I'll make it up to you I promise. Signed copies of my album for both of you...not that they're worth much." He slumped again at the thought. Megamind got up and walked over to him, stopping short of actually touching the huge man.

"Um...there there." He said. "Brainbots. Show Metro...Music Man to Minion's bedroom." The brainbots _bow_ _bowwed_ and escorted Wayne upstairs.

Leaving Megamind to face a furious Roxanne alone. He got ready to duck in case the lamp came flying at him this time. It didn't.

"Are you insane? You're letting him stay here?"

"It's only for a night. I couldn't kick him out. He looked so...me-lone-choly."

"Huh?"

"Sad. Empty. I've been there Roxanne, when it feels like your whole world has fallen down around you and there's nothing left..." he remembered that horrible feeling when his nemesis appeared gone forever.

And now he was staying in their house.

Roxanne sighed.

"All right, I guess you're right." Megamind hugged her and they walked upstairs together. "And it is only for one night."

"Yeah." He slowly lowered his hand to her backside and tried to kiss her neck but she pulled away.

"Nuh uh. No way."

"Huh? Why?" He snapped his hand back as though he'd been burned. It was extremely rare for her to turn him down for...well...anything really.

"We have a house guest with super hearing and x-ray vision. You're keeping your hands to yourself until he's out of here." She whispered in a tone that left no room for argument.

Megamind stared numbly ahead as they made their way to their bedroom and resolved to get Wayne out of their house by the following afternoon.

Megamind woke to the distant sound of metal clanging away. His hearing was slightly better than most humans, and he identified it as coming from the kitchen. What the...if those brainbots were downstairs causing mischief again he'd take their batteries out...

He yawned and walked downstairs and was greeted by the sight of the huge bearded Music Man at the stove, surrounded by mixing bowls, pans, measuring cups and white goo everywhere. He had a huge grin on his face.

"Morning little buddy! I thought I'd make the two of you breakfast to say thanks for letting me stay here. Love the pyjamas by the way, do they come in XXL?" he said. Megamind blushed and glanced down at himself. He felt so skinny and insignificant appearing shirtless before this giant, and the dark blue pants covered in shooting stars were doing nothing to make him feel manlier.

"That really isn't necessary." Megamind eyed the mountain of washing up the man had left in his quest to make pancakes. They did smell good though.

"It is. I was in a deep dark hole and you guys were there for me. It means a lot. And I feel much better now. Question though. Why is there a poster of Dory from Finding Nemo on the ceiling over Minion's bed?"

"Don't ask. I don't." Megamind shook his head and glanced at his watch. 7:30 am. Oh well, it was about time to get up anyway. He helped himself to pancakes and syrup and sat down at the table. Wayne sat down with him, his plate stacked up three times as high as Megamind's. He shrugged and looked embarrassed at Megamind's enquiring glance. He gestured at his vast bulk.

"This takes a lot of calories to run." He said. Megamind shrugged, idly wondering if he could have used that information to his advantage during his villainous career. Oh well, it was too late now.

All of a sudden Roxanne burst into the room flanked by Bitey and iBot. iBot was fairly distinctive these days. In addition to the iPod it had eaten and fused into its mechanism he had installed a small set of speakers into the sides of his head and convinced some of his fellow brainbots to respray him white. Megamind glared at the Apple logo it had etched in the back of its 'head'. That was just a copyright lawsuit waiting to happen...

"Good morning Megamind. Wayne." Her tone was still icy when she addressed the former hero. He pretended not to notice.

"Morning Roxy. You're stunning as always." Megamind had to agree. She was wearing a black skirt-suit and heels. There was nothing revealing about it but the cut showed off her curves to their full extent. He knew he was sporting a grin equally as dopey as the one often seen on Minion's face these days but he didn't care, he got the girl! Roxanne kissed Megamind's lips and poured herself some coffee, also made by Wayne.

"There's pancakes if you want some." Wayne offered.

"Thanks, I don't eat breakfast." She gulped her coffee down. "Listen Megamind, Carl just called and told me that news story has been moved up, I need to leave for Switzerland this morning. There's some sort of live feed of the phenomena they want to show that's going to happen our time tomorrow night. Can you be ready to head for the airport by nine?" she asked. Megamind blinked. So soon? It wouldn't take him long to pack...

He glanced at their house guest.

"What are your plans?" he asked Wayne. Wayne shrugged and looked awkward.

"Um...I'm kinda between places right now...do you need a house-sitter?" he asked. Megamind's eyes narrowed. Okay. There was more going on here than Wayne had admitted...

"The hideout?" Megamind asked. Wayne sighed.

"I took out a mortgage on the hideout to get the album released and...well...it's kinda been repossessed."

"Repossessed? What about all your stuff?" Roxanne asked.

"It's in storage." He was fidgeting again. Roxanne and Megamind were giving him that annoying identical Couple Monster stare of theirs again. "In a truck. In your driveway."

"Of course it is." Roxanne sighed and downed the rest of her coffee. "So how about it Megamind? Can you come?"

Megamind looked from his girlfriend to the fallen hero and back again. The choice between spending a long weekend in Switzerland with his girlfriend and babysitting his arch nemesis during his mental breakdown should have been an easy one.

It would have been. If he was only slightly more evil.

He sighed.

"I'm sorry Roxanne but I have some work I need to do here." He said. Everyone in the room knew it was a lie. Wayne was suddenly devoting all of his attention to his pancakes. Roxanne was wide-eyed and iBot...well he was playing some god-awful hip-hop song about Bros coming before Hoes...it dodged just in time to miss the plate Megamind hurled in its direction. "Enough you infernal machine! You two, clean up this kitchen!" he shouted at the brainbots. "Roxanne...I'll come upstairs and help you pack." He said as he took her hand and exited the room. As he went Bitey angrily aimed a fairly impressive electric shock at her Apple-branded counterpart.

Alone, Wayne slumped again with his head in his hands. Here he was, messing everything up for these guys too. He knew he should leave. But where else could he go?

Megamind pulled Roxanne into their bedroom and shut the door behind them. She stood there, arms crossed over her chest.

"Why are you doing this? I thought you wanted to come with me." Megamind glared.

"Because a weekend in the Swiss Alps with you just doesn't sound like fun, I thought I'd rather hang out with our hairy friend. Why do you think I'm doing it?" he snapped. Roxanne tried to keep the indignant anger going but it wasn't working.

She sat down on the foot of the bed.

"I'm sorry. I guess I'm just cranky. Why did he have to come back into our lives now?" she knew she was taking it all out on Megamind and that wasn't fair.

Megamind shrugged and sat down beside her.

"The most constant law of in the universe is Murphy's law." He sighed. He thought of that sparkly little ring back in its safe downstairs. Their trip away would have been the perfect opportunity. "We can still go another time. Unless the world ends in the meantime." He referred to her breaking news. She chuckled.

"I guess so. You're a good guy for doing this for him...mmm..." she said as he leaned in and pressed his lips to her neck. "I've got to go into the office before I leave."

"Carl can wait." He murmured into her ear and gently nibbled on the lobe. Roxanne blushed.

"Wayne's downstairs." She protested weakly while he undid the buttons on her jacket.

"You'll have to keep quiet then won't you?" he said and kissed her hard. Roxanne closed her eyes. She loved when he took charge like that, and when he tugged on her hair the way he was right now and that knack he had of undoing her blouse one-handed. She slipped her hand under the waistband of his pyjama pants when...

_ Knock knock._

"Hey guys? I just wanted to –whoa! Sorry! Bad timing..." Wayne walked in and promptly walked back out again. Roxanne slumped back onto the bed and felt Megamind do the same. She stared up at the ceiling.

"He'd better be gone by the time I get back." She said.

"If he's not I'll dehydrate him and mail him to Minion in Japan." Megamind promised.

Megamind waved a sad 'goodbye' as Roxanne drove away in a taxi. Bitey hovered beside him quietly _bowwing_ in a way that almost sounded like she was crying. Megamind patted her dome absently.

"It's all right. Mommy will be back soon." He said to himself as much as the brainbots. They hadn't really been apart for well over a year.

Wayne came up beside him and clapped him just a little too hard on the shoulder.

"Cheer up pal! I've got us some beers. Let's participate in the time-honoured human tradition of male bonding."

"You mean getting inebriated?" Megamind asked.

"Exactly." Wayne dragged him inside. Oh well, Megamind thought, it could be an interesting experience...


	3. Chapter 3

For this chapter, please read the following statement...

I know nothing about astrophysics. I'm not a science-y person. If (when) I get something wrong, please forgive me. Just suspend disbelief and go with it!

Disclaimer: I don't own Megamind. Or any other character from the movie. I wish I owned Minion. He looks helpful to have around...

Chapter 3

Roxanne's flight was not overly long but it was boring, and lonely. She'd come to accept that she was part of Megamind's mad world and she felt empty now without him there, or Minion, Bitey, iBot or an alligator or two. She quietly read her book on the plane, slept, ate something that tasted a little like she imagined Minion's fish flakes were like, and disembarked. There was a taxi waiting for her to take her to CERN where she would interview some of the astrophysicists, upload a video from their telescope, and then go back to her hotel for some sleep before going home ASAP.

She thought longingly of her weekend away with Megamind, now lost and gone forever.

She did feel sorry for Wayne on some level and knew she'd been overly harsh with him but he had been a massive inconvenience, and she'd never quite forgiven him for abandoning her and Metro City to their fate.

On the way to the CERN Institute Roxanne checked her voice mail.

MESSAGE. RECEIVED AT ELEVEN AM.

Carl: Hi Roxy. Just checking up on you, give me a call when you get there. Newman's camera man will be waiting for you at the Institute. Have a good flight.

MESSAGE. RECEIVED AT ONE PM.

Megamind: Roxanne? I miss you already! Have a great trip and come home as soon as you can, I love you! Oh, this is Megamind.

Roxanne shook her head. _Dumbass_, she thought, and smiled to herself.

MESSAGE. RECEIVED AT TWO. FORTY. FIVE. PM.

Megamind: Roxanne! Just letting you know we're okay! We're bonding. With beer! Taxi's on the way and we're going to a ba-ar. Talk to you later!

_ Oh dear._

MESSAGE. RECEIVED AT EIGHT. THIRTY. PM

(People talking and glass clinking in the background)

Megamind: Roxanne? Roxanne I love you so much. You're the most awesomenessest girlfriend in the world.

Wayne: Who's that?

Megamind: It's Roxanne. My awesomenest girlfriend.

Wayne: Roxy! How's it going in Sweeden?

Megamind: Swizzerland. And she can't answer it's a message you buffoon.

Wayne: Right. Swizzerland. Hey Roxy I juzz wanned to say I'm happy for you guys. I love you Roxy but you were never my type. You were waaaay too smart. You always did have a great ass though.

Megamind: What did you say? Don't talk about my girlfriend's ass!

Wayne: Take it as a compliment.

Megamind: Why I oughta...

(Thud. Breaking glass.)

Megamind: Ow! Why the hell is your head so hard?

Random shouting man: Hey! You two get out!

(Angry voices. Dial tone)

Roxanne checked the time on her watch. Back home it was nearly midnight. She shuddered, wondering what mischief the two of them got up to after that last message, and then chuckled at the thought of the two aliens sharing Megamind's old cell in Metro City Prison. She shook her head and looked out the window at the city she was driving through, supposing she would just have to get used to being away from home more often.

She glanced back at her phone. Fifteen text messages, all from Megamind.

_ Oh dear._

Wayne flew crookedly back to Megamind's New Not Evil Lair with the small blue man hoisted under one arm. It was late...very late...and dark. He was wearing black so they probably wouldn't be spotted. If they were...well he was too drunk to care really.

Ahh it had been fun. Megamind was a lightweight, of course, ten beers and the poor little guy was swaying. The eight tequila shots at the second last bar had just about done him in. At the last bar he sat holding a glass of iced water and shaking his head vowing to never drink again, shortly before hugging the porcelain.

Wayne landed outside of the front door of the lair and kicked the door in. Megamind was way too gone to be able to unlock the door. He carried his little buddy upstairs, put him to bed with a bucket, and wandered back downstairs to find his guitar, still packed up in the truck.

He didn't need to sleep much.

Wayne sat back on the couch, feet up on the coffee table, and strummed a few chords. The guitar sounded a little off but damned if he could get it tuned properly.

Then he heard a low 'twang' of a perfectly tuned 'E' string. He looked around. That white brainbots with the personality disorder was hovering in the corner, and it played the note again. Wayne adjusted his guitar accordingly, and the brainbot played an 'A'.

"Well aren't you something. How'd you do that?" he asked.

_App_, the brainbots _bowwed_. It played the next note. _iBot_, it introduced itself.

"Nice to meet you iBot. I'm Wayne." iBot vaguely remembered being crushed and dismembered by this man on several occasions. It helped the man tune his guitar and listened to the resulting chords. Much better. iBot hummed along with a synth bass-guitar sound.

"Not bad, iBot. Not bad at all." iBot _bowwed_ happily. At least someone around here appreciated him.

Wayne jammed with the little robot until the unknown quantity of alcohol finally caught up with him and he fell asleep on the couch.

Megamind surfaced from his bedroom well after midday. His head hurt and he hovered between being nauseous and ravenously hungry. He made his way downstairs to find Wayne watching the music channel with iBot.

"Good morning Sunshine!" he said cheerfully. His voice felt like it would shatter Megamind's eardrums like a rock through a glass window.

"Shh. Too loud." Megamind whispered and searched the kitchen for painkillers. He found a tube of something vaguely medicinal looking and choked down half of it, followed by some water.

"I made you some breakfast. Or lunch. Either way." Wayne held out a plate. Clearly the portion size was based on his own needs. Megamind gaped at the heaped mound of eggs, bacon, sausages, toast and hash browns and his stomach roiled. He wasn't sure if he was craving food or about to hurl again.

"Thanks. Um...I remember up to that biker bar. Did anything bad happen after that?" Wayne thought back to the night before.

"Biker bar...oh yeah the pole dancing. You were great by the way. We got kicked out of there when you insisted Minion was in your glass."

"That doesn't sound so bad." Megamind took a bite of a sausage and instantly attacked the rest of his plate.

"You fought off two waitresses and a bouncer you accused of trying to fishnap him."

"Oh. Is that why my hand hurts?"

"Yeah. You've got a mean right hook I'll give you that." Megamind rubbed the bridge of his nose.

"Just don't tell Roxanne okay?" he pleaded.

"Don't have to. You did. You checked in at nearly every bar we went to."

"Oh no..."

"As for the text messages...if she can figure out what they're meant to say I think she's gonna slap you when she gets back." Wayne laughed. "We've got to do that again sometime."

"No. We've got to find _you_ a new place before Roxanne gets back."

"I'll start looking tomorrow I promise. For now, the top 100 rock anthems from the 80's is on Music Max." Megamind perked up.

"Okay." Goofing off watching TV sounded like a great idea. He moved over to the couch with his half-eaten brunch and a fork. "We've got to watch the news tonight though. Roxanne's going to be on it."

"She's on it every night. She's a reporter." Wayne shrugged. Megamind glared.

"We're watching the news." He said.

"Okay okay." Wayne agreed.

They spent the rest of the afternoon slacking off in front of the television. iBot hovered beside Wayne and the two of them offered commentary on the countdown. Megamind sat with Bitey in his lap stroking her dome absently thinking that listening to music from a decade famous for guitar solos and amplifiers was not doing his sore head a lot of good.

Just before six o'clock number one played (_Back in Black_ by ACDC, Megamind approved of the choice) and he flicked the channel over to Roxanne's network. The anchor Chris was nattering about something to do with politics. Then Harry Newman came onto the screen.

"Metro City was hit by a pair of drunken vandals last night posing as Mega Man and what looked like a member of a motorcycle gang." Wayne started laughing.

"Mega Man?"

"Shh!" Megamind stared horrified at the screen. "You didn't tell me about that!"

"I forgot about it. You gotta admit it's funny."

"The two vandals were seen bar-hopping through the city. Their crimes included defacing of public property, public urination, being drunk and disorderly " CCTV footage showed the two of them in the centre of town. Wayne was peeing into the fountain. Megamind was giggling and spray painting a fire hydrant blue.

"Where did we get spray paint from?" he asked. Wayne shrugged. Newman finished up his story with an appeal to the public to help police track down the Mega Man impersonator. There were a few more stories, and finally in the spot reserved for quirky human interest pieces or stories from overseas, Roxanne was introduced.

"And now we cross to Roxanne Ritchie in Switzerland. Roxanne, what's this we're hearing about the end of the world?" Chris the anchor asked condescendingly.

Roxanne, on the other hand, looked crisp and professional as always.

"Well Chris the astrophysics department at the CERN Institute in Switzerland say they have quite possibly spotted the largest, closest black hole ever recorded to the planet Earth."

"Didn't they say last year that they were trying to _create_ a black hole at that place?" Wayne asked.

"Shh!" Seeing Roxanne on the screen reminded Megamind of how much he missed her.

"Dr. Finlayson, just how much of a threat is this phenomena?"

"Miss Ritchie we at CERN have never seen anything like it. We're not exactly sure of what it is or where it came from, but we know it is approaching Earth at an accelerating speed. As these images show the phenomena has gotten bigger over the last few years. This photograph was taken ten years ago, followed by these two taken five and two years ago." Megamind frowned at the television screen, and then froze as the images showed on the screen. "And as you can see here we now have video footage. It's unlike anything we've seen before." Before it came up on the screen Megamind knew what it would be. A swirling pink cloud of matter circling a dull black circular void. He sat up straight on the couch, headache and hangover forgotten.

"Wayne!" he said and pointed at the screen. Wayne looked up lazily from his guitar playing.

"Yeah what izzzz...holy crab nuggets." He dropped his instrument and stared at the screen.

"How close is the phenomena at this moment?" Roxanne asked the scientist. He rattled off some numbers that Megamind committed to memory...it wasn't all that close. If the information was accurate at all. But if it was...

"And what is the worst case scenario?" she asked the scientist.

"The worst case is the destruction of the Earth, Miss Ritchie." He answered seriously. Roxanne's face remained professionally neutral but Megamind knew exactly what Roxanne was thinking by the look in her eyes. _Crackpot. Nerd. _

"You heard it here first Metro City. This is Roxanne Ritchie, reporting on the possible end of the world. Back to you Chris."

"Thanks Roxanne. And now to David with sport. David I hear the cowboys are set for another great season..." Megamind jumped up and started pacing.

"Calm down little buddy. It might not even be the same one..." Wayne let the sentence trail off. _That destroyed both our homeworlds. _Megamind stared at him.

"It's the same one. The coordinates are between our old solar system and here. It looked the same...how many pink vortexes of destruction do you think there are in the universe?"

"I don't know. You're the brainiac." Megamind frowned.

"There shouldn't even be one like this. Black holes don't move. They stay stationary and..." he couldn't finish.

"Suck everything else in." Wayne finished for him. "But Earth is too far away isn't it?" The colour drained from Megamind's face.

"It's getting closer...no wait. Wait! _It's_ not getting closer. _We're_ getting closer to _it_!" He said. This was bad. Very bad.

Wayne eventually broke the silence.

"Looks like you've got yourself a hell of a problem, hero."


	4. Chapter 4

Hello fellow Fan Fiction aficionados!

Although I'm quite pleased with the number of hits this story has gotten, I have a teeny little complaint...no reviews! Please review! We authors are a needy bunch

Disclaimer: I don't own Megamind. He belongs to Roxanne now

Chapter 4

Megamind sat in his office/lab not long later pouring over numbers, readouts and photographs. His own telescope was too weak to find the vortex (he'd installed it for presentation over functionality) and so he was busily hacking into CERN, NASA, the Hubble telescope and the space agencies in several other countries.

"Coffee! I need coffee!" he shouted, wishing Minion was there. The fish knew how to keep him calm, and how to make his coffee just the way he liked it (black with eight sugars). He scribbled down a stream of numbers onto paper and handed it to a brainbots to add to the idea cloud.

"Light! I need more light in here." He shouted, hunched over two laptops in front of his giant monitor. He printed off another photograph from Hubble and added it to his collection from various dates. The brainbots started bringing lamps in from all over the lair.

And Wayne...he stood awkwardly in a corner.

"I'd love to help you little buddy but..." his voice trailed off.

"But you're done. I get it." Megamind said shortly, not really angry but he didn't have time to play nursemaid to Wayne's emotions.

"Well, yeah, but the whole astrophysics thing...I'm more of a smash the problem, rescue the girl, drag the bad guy off to prison kind of hero."

"Could you be an ordering pizza kind of hero? Ronnie's Pizza. The number's on the fridge door and there's some cash in a safe over there" Megamind said and gestured to his hidden safe, partly to get him out of the room, partly because being in an intellectual buzz always made him ravenous. "iBot! Music! Some easy listening..." iBot started cranking out some System of a Down. Megamind sighed. "Much better, thanks."

Wayne wandered over to the blinking bleeping machinery and opened up the hidden compartment he'd already noticed. There was a wad of notes there (enough to pay for a year's supply of pizza, even with his appetite) and a little black velvet box. He looked over at Megamind.

"Are you serious?" he laughed and picked up the box. He opened the lid. "Wow. That's quite a rock. Did you steal it?" he asked. Megamind looked up. His cheeks flushed purple.

"Give me that!" he darted over and snatched it back. He looked at the sparkly stone, irrationally concerned for its safety. _My precious_, he thought absently. "I didn't steal it. I made it. It was compressed in this very lab. It's flawless." He said and shut the lid. He put the little box in a pocket in his cape.

"Relax little buddy, I was just kidding."

"Will you stop calling me that? My name is Megamind." He snapped. Wayne's face fell.

"Sorry...Megamind." Megamind sighed and rubbed the bridge of his nose. His headache was coming back.

"Look if you're not going to fly off into space and smash this black hole into oblivion with one sweep of your white spandex-covered fist I suggest you leave me alone and let me work." He went back to his desk. Wayne stared after the former villain. He knew that even at the height of his career as a superhero he would have had trouble with this one.

Wayne went to the telephone and ordered a supreme pizza and an extra-large nachos for Megamind, and then sat down in the lounge, feeling big, awkward and useless. iBot followed him _bowwing_ sympathetically.

"Hey iBot. Can you find a recording of Roxanne's news story?" Wayne asked suddenly. iBot _bowwed_ and brought YouTube up on the big screen. There it was. A video of the news story. Wayne watched it through twice, listening carefully to everything the scientist was saying. Maybe there was one thing he could do to help...

Roxanne sank down into the bathtub in her hotel room with a happy sigh. She was booked on a flight out the next day and decided while she had some peace and quiet she may as well enjoy it. The bathroom was softly lit with candles, the tub was huge and the room had come with a complementary bottle of champagne. She took a sip of her drink, placed the glass back down on the little table beside the bathtub and picked up her book when...

_ Tap tap tap._

Roxanne jumped, splashing water on the floor. Where had that come from? The bathroom window?

_ Tap tap tap._

"Roxy? Roxy are you in there?" Roxanne knew that voice. But how? "Hey Roxy! Don't pretend you can't hear me." He started singing a familiar song at her "I got eyes, that can see, right through le-e-e-ead..."

"Oh why are you here?" she grumbled. "Keep your x-ray vision to yourself while I get dressed."

"Of course!" he said indignantly through the glass window. "I'd never violate your privacy in such a way..." Roxanne pulled on a white fluffy robe, tied the sash and opened the window. Wayne's hairy face grinned in at her.

"What do you want?" she asked.

"Can't a guy just..."

"No! Why are you here?" she cut him off. His face fell.

"I...erm...just wanted to tell you how great that news report was. That was really first class journalism there." Roxanne stared him down. He continued. "Really interesting stuff. Um...you wouldn't happen to know where that scientist lives would you?" Roxanne shook her head.

"Why would I know that? It was just a filler story about crackpot scientists."

"Yeah, of course. Now what was his name again?"

"Dr. Iain Finlayson. Why?" He laughed an awkward sort of a laugh.

"Oh just curious. Enjoy your bath Roxy! I've got to head off. Megamind says 'hi'" He flew off so fast he was a blur against the night sky. Roxanne shivered and shut the window. She looked mournfully at the bathtub, sighed again and went back to the bedroom to pack. She was tired and jetlagged but she knew something was up back home, and if it had anything to do with that news story of hers then the potential for trouble was huge.

She took out her phone and dialled home. Megamind answered.

"_Ollo_ Roxanne! Are you having fun over there?" his voice sounded strained.

"Not as much fun as you and your new buddy had last night." She remarked. Megamind coughed.

"Um...yeah...I suppose you read those messages already did you?"

"Read, and heard. You're in trouble when I get back, but speaking of your buddy, why is he in Switzerland?" she asked.

"What?"

"Wayne. He was just at my bathroom window asking for that scientist's home address. You wouldn't know anything about that would you?" Megamind muttered to himself, something that sounded like "...not a bad idea..." and then spoke up again.

"Oh you know Way-en, he probably got bored and decided to go for a fly and say 'hi'." Roxanne's nosey reporter instincts were kicking in.

"What aren't you telling me Megamind?" she demanded.

"Nothing, nothing. Everything is just fine."

"I'm coming home on the next flight."

"_No!_ Stay there for a while. Relax. We'll be fine here. I'll see you in a few days."

"Really?" she asked. There was a pause.

"Of course. I've got a project I'm working on at the moment so I have to go. Remember, should anything catastrophically apocalyptic happen over the next few days (as a random, non-specific example), I love you Roxanne."

"I love you too Megamind." She said as he ended the phone call. "And I'm coming home you sneaky, lying little villain."

In spite of the situation Megamind was pleased. The pizza and nachos had just arrived, Roxanne was completely unsuspecting because of his amazing skill for concealing the truth, and Wayne was on his way with a scientist who could make his job much, much easier.

He was making good progress with his research. He had a good estimate of the vortex's mass, size and relative position to the Earth. He had been right before. The vortex was pulling the Earth towards it. He had a few vague ideas of how to close the thing but nothing concrete as yet.

After Megamind was full of food, as if on cue, Wayne's fast, blurry form materialised in his work room carrying a limp older man wearing pyjamas and a dressing gown.

"Ah! Way-en! Excellent work." He said as the man plonked the scientist into Minion's chair.

"Glad I could help little...Megamind. Hey pizza!" Wayne helped himself, piling left-over nachos onto the biggest slice left. Megamind rummaged around in his desk and found the smelling salts he kept for old times' sake. "You might wanna tie him up first. He wasn't too happy about coming along for the ride. Screamed all the way until he passed out somewhere over the Atlantic." Wayne suggested around a mouthful of food. Megamind mentally slapped himself. Of course! The ropes. He was out of practice and getting kidnapping advice from Metro Man! How embarrassing.

"I was just about to do that!" he snapped and took the ropes out of his desk. He expertly bound the scientist to the chair and waved the smelling salts under his nose.

The scientist's eyes fluttered. Megamind snapped his fingers and a brainbots landed in his lap for him to stroke. He gestured with his head for Wayne to stand behind him.

"Look intimidating." He murmured out the corner of his mouth. Wayne moved behind the blue alien, flexed his arms and set his face into a scowl. The scientist's eyes opened.

"What...where am I?" He looked at Megamind and started screaming. Megamind allowed himself an evil smirk. _Finally. A victim who knew how to act in these situations_.

"You can scream all you wish Dr. Finlayson but no one can hear you." He said, stroking the brainbot.

"You know who I am? _Who are you?_"

"Who am I? You haven't heard of me? Megamind: The world-renowned incredibly handsome extra-terrestrial master of all villainy?"

"Retired." Wayne chimed in. Dr. Finlayson blinked.

"What is this about? Do you want money?" he asked. Megamind rolled his eyes.

"No, but thank you for the offer. Actually I require your assistance. With this." Megamind snapped his fingers again and a small swarm of brainbots drew back the black curtains in front of his idea cloud.

There, suspended from the ceiling, was a near-perfect replica of the pink and black swirling vortex made of notes, sketches, print-outs and photographs.

Wayne and Dr. Finlayson were both silent. Megamind surveyed his work proudly. He hadn't lost his flair for presentation.

"So you believe my research? None of the others do." Finlayson said.

"I believe it. I've known of its existence for my entire life. I just never thought Earth would be affected by it." Megamind said. Finlayson shrugged.

"It is too late now. Nothing can be done to stop it. Our galaxy has begun circling the drain hole and it is only a matter of time now. Our world was doomed the moment this thing was created."

"I have several theories of how we can stop this. Read my papers and tell me what you think. Astrophysics was never my strongest area."

"You are an alien who knows nothing about astrophysics?" Dr Finlayson said sceptically.

"I spent my life planning world domination, not boldly going where no man has gone before." Megamind snapped.

"What did you mean by 'created'?" Wayne asked suddenly.

"Vortexes form when a big enough star collapses in on itself." Megamind explained.

"They do. But this one didn't." Finlayson corrected him. Megamind frowned.

"Come again?"

"Ahhh not so smart now Mr. Blue Alien?" said Finlayson. On cue a brainbots brought in the Spinning Boot Wheel of Pain. He stared at it and licked his lips. "Vortexes of this magnitude do not exist in nature. If they did the universe simply couldn't exist. This thing is drawing the universe in on itself and eventually there will be nothing left. This was created. By a massive clash of two very different forms of energy." Megamind looked to Wayne, perplexed. Wayne was pale.

"Like if maybe two different kinds of alien were at war with one another?" he suggested. Dr. Finlayson shrugged.

"Who knows?"

Megamind looked at Wayne.

"What are you getting at?" he asked.

"Can we talk in private?" he asked. Megamind took out another relic from the past. One swipe of the Forget-Me Stick and the scientist was once again limp in the chair.

"Of course. What is it?"

"Think, Megamind. Our people were at war. All of a sudden a huge black hole shows up and devours them both? That's a pretty amazing coincidence."

"Are you saying we did this? Don't be ridiculous. The energy required would be..."

"Possible. Think of it. Millions of you fighting millions of me." Megamind's head spun with the possibility. The potential for catastrophe was huge. Now he was thinking it all made horrible sense.

"Now there's only one of you. And one of me. How do we stop this?"

Wayne shrugged and helped himself to more pizza.

"Who says you can? This is a big one. No one would blame you for throwing in the towel. If you like I can drop you off in Switzerland. You can spend your last remaining days in existence planted firmly between Roxy's thighs." Megamind glared at the fallen hero.

"Are you serious?" he demanded.

"There are worse places to be."

"And I plan to be there for several decades yet." He shouted. "Throw in the towel? Let this thing, this inanimate object suck up the entire universe simply because we can't be bothered with it?"

"It's not that I can't be _bothered_. It's that this thing is beyond anything we can do." Wayne said.

"Speak for yourself." Megamind growled. "If you won't be of any use to me then go. Hit up a bar or something. I'm going to try and save the universe."

"It's a tiring, thankless job."

"Thank you for your help, Way-en, but you should go now. The good doctor and I have some work to do." Megamind said and turned back to his screens. Wayne sighed and walked out.

"Later, iBot." He said as he passed the brainbots. It _bowwed_, looked from its master to its new friend, and followed the large, hairy and tone-deaf man out of New Not Evil Lair.


	5. Chapter 5

Sorry about the delay people I had some serious writers' block on this one. Hope you enjoy and thanks for the reviews! They're much appreciated

Disclaimer: I don't own Megamind, and can't come up with a funny disclaimer this morning

Chapter 5

After a brief tour of the alligator enclosure Dr. Finlayson was more than happy to assist Megamind in devising a way to close the vortex. The two of them devised a rough count-down to the point where Earth would reach the point of no return (approximately 28 hours away, as of 1 am). The Earth would not end by that point, but escape would be impossible, and destroying the vortex would likely take the Earth with it.

They worked together for as long as they could. The doctor worked on examining the phenomena. Megamind got his old shuttle out of storage and began readying it for take-off. Whatever would be needed to fix this problem was not going to happen from the ground.

"Wrench." He called to the brainbots assisting him. There was the sound of scuffling. "Wrench! I need the wrench!"

[[Fetch the wrench?]] one of them _bowwed_ at him.

"No! Give _me_ the wrench!" he shouted. It _bowwed_ grumpily at him. For the hundredth time that day Megamind wished Minion was there to help him. What lousy timing this all was. The brainbot reluctantly handed him the tool and watched as Megamind patched up the shuttle. Megamind climbed out from under the vehicle and dusted himself off. "Here." He tossed it into the far end of the work room and watched them all zoom off to get it. One brought it back to him _bowwing_ happily. Megamind scribbled down a few items onto a piece of paper.

"I need this stuff. Go and get it." The brainbots took the paper in its jaws and the swarm of robots flew away. Megamind knew that this would cause problems; that he would most likely have the police on his front doorstep in the morning demanding to know why his brainbots had stolen tonnes of aircraft fuel and a few million dollars worth of equipment from the airport. He didn't know what to tell them other than it was top-secret important hero business.

He looked over at his reluctant ally. The doctor had fallen asleep at his desk. Megamind walked over and read through the document he had been working on. His heart sank. Judging from the types of radiation the vortex emitted, this was definitely caused by his people, Metro Man's people, or (more likely) a combination of both. The radiation types were the same as the ones emitted by their escape pods.

He frowned. Perhaps...

He programmed a simulation into one of his computers using Dr. Finlayson's data. He tried using a virtual burst of the radiation from his energy source directly into the vortex...

The damned thing got bigger. He hit the 'undo' button.

He tried the same thing with the radiation from Wayne's space pod. There was no effect.

Megamind tried the simulation over and over again using combinations of both types of energy. Finally, in a moment of frustration, he programmed a scenario into the computer and hit the 'enter' key.

The vortex closed.

Megamind's stomach knotted. Of course that would have worked. That energy burst had been enormous, as if both his and Wayne's pods had collided and exploded right at the epicentre of the vortex. He stared at the computer screen where a simulated image of the vortex had just been. Now it was a pink cloud of debris sitting peacefully in space.

_Now what?_, he thought to himself. He had a solution to the problem, but how on Earth was he ever going to carry it out? The amount of energy he would need was enormous.

He glanced at the count-down he had playing on the biggest monitor in the lab.

_25 hours, 45 minutes and 39 seconds..._

Megamind was bone-weary. His caffeine had done as much as it could and now he needed to rest. He called out to the brainbots, and Bitey came to him. He smiled at Roxanne's favourite, missing her much more than he thought he would after such a short time. He had to succeed. For her.

"I need to wake up at six o'clock. Okay? Wake me up at six a.m." Bitey bobbed up and down and bowwed. He smiled and leaned back in his chair as Bitey settled in his lap. He stroked its dome gently and willed himself to sleep.

Roxanne dropped her bags at the front door and ran down to where she knew Megamind would be, in his lab rather than their bed. Something was up, she could smell it. Wayne's moving truck was gone from their garage and there were brainbots zooming in and out carrying what looked like mechanical parts and drums of fuel.

She found him in his chair at his desk, asleep with Bitey in his lap. At Minion's desk was Dr. Finlayson, also asleep.

Roxanne was both gratified to see her suspicions confirmed, and panicked as to what this meant. Megamind was _good_ now. He didn't just kidnap foreign scientists for the sheer hell of it. She looked at him. He was wearing a spandex bodysuit, boots and gloves with only modest spiking and a simple cape. Her mood softened despite the double dose of jet lag and rather than scaring him awake so he fell out of his chair (which had been her intention: some of those text messages had been truly offensive) she bent down and kissed his lips. Like a blue Sleeping Beauty with a giant bald head his eyes fluttered open. First he blinked, and then he frowned.

"Roxanne? Where am I? What time is it?" he glanced down at his watch. "Five forty...wait a minute! What are you doing here? You're in Switzerland!" he stared at her.

"I have some friends in high places. They got me on an early flight out." She said. He shook his head and tried to get up. She pushed him back into his seat. "Now what's going on?" she demanded.

"Going on? Why would there be something –ow!" she grabbed his earlobe and tugged on it roughly. He squirmed. "Really there's no need for this! It's just a slight problem is all. Trivial even..." his eyes watered as she began to twist his ear. "Alright! _Jeez_ and they called me evil." He grumbled and swatted her hand away from him. "There's a huge black hole sucking us down into oblivion. It just happens to be the same one that devoured my home planet oh, and by the way, my species and Wayne's seem to have created it." She blinked and her eyes looked foggy as she tried to process the information. He glared at her. "Now don't you wish you'd done what I said and stayed in Switzerland?" Bitey stirred at the sound of them arguing. Its red eye flashed on and it glowed bright pink.

[[Mommy!]] it _bowwed_ and threw itself into Roxanne's arms. She hugged it in spite of her shock.

"So the world is ending?" she found herself asking.

"The _universe_ is ending." Megamind corrected her. She stroked the brainbot absently as the colour drained from her face.

"Can you stop it?" she asked. For the first time Megamind had an inkling of why Wayne had done what he did. The hope in her eyes, the faith that he could swoop in and save the day no matter what the problem, made him feel as though he carried the weight of the world on his shoulders.

He was no Wayne. He was just a little blue man with a big head. He stared up at his thought cloud, the black centre of the vortex surrounded by orange, pink and purple notes. He had to be honest.

"I don't know Roxanne. I really don't." He sighed. Roxanne drew in a deep breath, glad she had slept on the plane.

"What can I do to help?" she asked. Megamind looked over at his newly refurbished spacecraft. It was more or less operational (the brainbots could finish prepping it for launch) but he needed to improvise a high-powered laser. Roxanne had a brilliant journalist's mind and a talent for finding the truth (no matter how hard he tried to hide it from her) but her engineering skills weren't much better than the average brainbots...probably a little worse to be honest.

"Can you hand me my tools?" he asked. She laughed, slightly higher-pitched than normal.

"Okay."

Wayne drove his truck along the highway heading out of Metro City singing along with whatever was coming through the speakers. Even he knew he was off-key. He heard Megamind's voice in his head. _Thankyou for your help, Way-en, but you should go now._ Megamind had been right to send him away. He was worse than useless, a washed up hero whose change of career choice wasn't successful enough to see him called a washed-up musician.

He glanced down at his new, somewhat unusual companion who sat in the passenger seat plugged into the AUX cable. iBot. The two of them had something in common. Both had left the hero business for life on the road with their music. Wayne was grateful for the company. He'd never had a side-kick before, and one with in-built auto-tune would come in very handy. He might even get a gig somewhere with iBot's help.

Wayne heard Megamind's voice again in his mind and sighed.

"Never mind, Robo-buddy. We'd just be in the way back there. We're moving onto bigger and better things." _If_ Megamind saved them all. On the bright side if he didn't Wayne wouldn't have to worry about finding a new place to stay after all.

iBot quietly watched the large man. The brainbot loved music as much as anyone (more than most) but he was first and foremost a brainbot, and hero/villain business was his job.

Daddy was his creator and a genius to be reckoned with whether he was good or evil, but iBot knew this challenge was too much for even him to face alone. He switched himself off 'shuffle' and started playing a song he'd chosen deliberately. Wayne started drumming along on the steering wheel.

_Far away, this ship is taking me far away,_

_Far away from my memories, of the people who card if I live or die._

Wayne drove along humming and watching the road. iBot turned the volume up.

_Our hopes and expectations,_

_Black holes and revelations._

_Our hopes and expectations,_

_Black holes and revelations._

He looked down at the little robot, and for the first time iBot saw a flash of anger in the man's eyes.

"I thought you were along for the ride." He said. iBot said nothing. Wayne sighed. "It's hopeless. I couldn't help if I wanted to. There was a whole planet full of my people and they couldn't stop this. What am I meant to do? It's not like Little Buddy can do anything either a whole planet full of his people couldn't stop it either. We're doomed. Might as well enjoy the road." He said. The song finished. iBot let silence fill the truck's cabin.

Wayne stared at the road but really only saw Megamind's face. The hurt little boy he tormented at school, the devastated villain who lost his hero, and finally the man whose friend...yes _friend_...had let him down. And then there was Roxy, who'd been the most loyal friend he'd ever had. Yes, their arrangement had helped both of their careers simultaneously, but where having her as his 'girlfriend' had enabled him to keep fan-girls as booty calls who gratefully accepted 'no strings attached' sex on account of his girlfriend, no man wanted to be involved with a girl whose 'boyfriend' was seven feet tall and could easily hurl a skyscraper across a city if he wanted to. The poor girl's dry spell had lasted so long she'd gone for _Megamind_, for heavens' sake! Roxy and Megamind, the only two people on this planet who cared about _him_, _Wayne_, not just the hero.

He was a lousy friend.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

It was 8 in the morning. The brainbots had the coffee flowing and Megamind had both Roxanne and Dr. Finlayson helping him with the weapon.

It was the most incredibly frustrating morning of Megamind's life.

"Pass me the 4 millimetre wrench."

"Is that the same as the 1/8 inch?" Roxanne handed him a tool.

"No. I need a four millimetre. Metric."

"Does it matter?" she asked. Megamind sighed.

"You Americans. How did you ever get to be a world power? You're all still living in the dark ages!" Finlayson commented.

"How about this one?" Roxanne handed him another one.

"No. The measurements are engraved on the side. Here."

"Oh. How about a five? I have a five millimetre here they can't be too much different can they?" Megamind kept his mouth shut while inside he was screaming with rage.

"Um...thankyou Roxanne." The doorbell rang.

"I'll go get it." Roxanne offered. _Thank you, random visitor_, Megamind thought to himself. He found the wrench he needed (right where it belonged in the tool box marked clearly '4mm') and tightened the bolt he needed.

"What do you think?" he asked the doctor. He examined the machine.

"You know more about this technology than I do, Dr. Megamind." Megamind liked the sound of that. He did hold a PHD or two (they kept him busy during his teenage years) but he never considered the 'Doctor' prefix before. He decided to look into it, should the world not end after all. "Can we test it?" Finlayson asked. Megamind was wondering the same thing.

"Maybe a low-powered burst but there's nothing I can really aim at. I stopped blowing up buildings a while ago." He said, regretfully.

"Did I hear somebody ask for an indestructible target?" a voice boomed. Megamind whirled around. Wayne stood in the corner of the room flanked by iBot. _Wayne!_

"You came back!" Megamind exclaimed. Wayne ran his fingers through his too-long hair.

"Yeah my comeback tour can wait a few weeks."

Megamind grinned, went to the man and offered him his hand.

"Thanks for coming back. We could really use your help." He said. Wayne picked him up and gave him an uncomfortably tight squeeze.

"No problem. Right, where do you want me?" he asked. Megamind frowned.

"You know there is a slight risk. This beam _is_ designed to destroy a black hole." He said. Wayne shrugged.

"You spent two decades trying to blow me up Little Buddy, I don't think you're going to manage it by accident now." He said. Megamind hoped he was right.

"Okay. Let's set this up." He had to admit he was excited to see his creation in action. The doctor clapped his hands.

"This is much more exciting than playing with atoms." He said.

Roxanne opened the front door to be greeted by a handful of police officers, the mayor, several men wearing uniforms that looked like...airport security? A pair of men in black suits and sunglasses. And finally...

"Harry Newman." Roxanne said the name with barely contained contempt. The ineffectual little man pushed forward, flanked by the new intern holding a camera.

"Roxanne Ritchie! Do you have any comment to make on your partner's alleged theft of government property?"

"No comment Harry. Can I help the rest of you gentlemen?"

"Miss Ritchie, these men have a warrant for Megamind's arrest." The mayor explained. Roxanne raised an eyebrow.

"FBI?" she guessed.

"And NSA."

"Oh." Megamind would be thrilled. He'd never attracted the men in black before.

"I persuaded them to let me talk to him first. Is he here?"

"Yes come on in." She let the mayor in. The others made as if to follow. Roxanne stepped into the doorway.

"You can all wait here."

"You can't keep this quiet!" Harry had shouted angrily. "The public has a right to know!"

"This is my home, Harry, and you're not invited in. Mind the alligators. Toothy has been getting out of his enclosure lately. We really do need to fix those bars..." she said as she shut them out, allowing herself an evil smile as she did.

Once inside the mayor looked around nervously.

"There isn't really an alligator loose is there?" he asked. Roxanne shrugged.

"I don't know. Don't worry. It's usually Gummy that gets out, and he lost his teeth a few years ago."

"Lost his teeth?"

"Too much candy. And he wouldn't have his teeth cleaned." She led him down into Megamind's workshop. The mayor was staring at her and shaking his head.

Roxanne started explaining the situation on the way down. The mayor had a blank expression on his face.

"I don't understand." He said.

"It's all to do with the news story I reported on for yesterday's evening news. You did watch it didn't you?"

"Um...I usually switch off after the headlines. I did see Newman's piece on those two vandals. I'll have to question Megamind about the vandalism, it didn't look like an impersonator to me."

_ Great._

"Well to cut a long story short, the Earth is about to be swallowed by a black hole. Megamind st- _borrowed_ the fuel and components in order to save us all." He didn't look convinced.

"It all sounds a bit far-fetched to me." He muttered.

"Mr. Mayor, it's all hero business. I swear there's nothing remotely evil or maniacal happening here..." The lights in the lab dimmed.

"FIRE IN THE HOLE!" Megamind's voice boomed as a pair of blue and white beams spiralled across the workshop and hit a gigantic men (_Wayne?_) square in the chest on the other side. Roxanne gasped and knocked the Mayor to the ground before they were hit by the shockwave. There was a crash and debris started to fall where Wayne had been hurled through the wall out of the lab.

There was silence. Wayne poked his head back in through the hole.

"I'm ooooookay!" he shouted. There was laughter coming from Megamind and Dr. Finlayson.

"Haha! How awesome was that? That was at 2% intensity!" Megamind shouted.

"Can we do it again?" The doctor asked, rubbing his hands together. Wayne shook his head, his long hair was standing on end.

"Couldn't you have started it at 1%?" he asked.

"I only wish Minion were here to see it. He always loved blowing stuff up. Especially you."

"Yeah." Wayne smiled at the memories. Roxanne helped the Mayor to his feet. She cleared her throat. All three men turned and looked at her with guilty expressions on their face.

"The Mayor wanted to ask you some questions about some stolen aircraft components?" Megamind's grin subsided.

"Oh, that. I've been expecting you." He said.

They tried to explain the situation to the Mayor, but his mind was built for politics, not astrophysics. In the end he decided that, despite the bright green numbers counting down on the giant monitor, Megamind really did need to head downtown and talk to the FBI/NSA agents who were standing outside. He sighed.

"Fine, fine. I'll come. Just let me give my colleagues some instructions for while I'm away." He said, clearly frustrated. The Mayor nodded. "Roxanne, perhaps the Mayor would like some coffee?" he asked. Roxanne bit back an angry remark (she was _not_ his goddamned secretary!) and smiled sweetly.

"Of course, _Honeybunch_." Megamind flinched, knowing was in trouble later. "Mr. Mayor?" she gestured for him to follow her.

Ten minutes later Megamind met them in the kitchen.

"Very well Mr. Mayor. Let's make this quick, we don't have a lot of time." He said. "Roxanne the others will need your help. Please assist them however you can.

"Of course." She said. He gave her a brief, awkward kiss on the cheek and checked the time on his watch.

"Time is running out." He muttered. Roxanne frowned as she looked into his eyes, and finally understood.

"I'll be waiting." She said and hugged him convincingly and chewed her bottom lip as he left with the little bald man.

She watched from the doorway as he was driven away in the back of a black SUV. Once all the vehicles had left (including the network's van, driven by a sour-faced Harry Newman) she bolted downstairs.

Megamind was waiting for her in his black spandex under-suit. She threw herself wordlessly into his arms. He hugged her tight, kissed her and gazed at her with his brilliant green eyes.

The Megamind in the kitchen had eyes of grey-blue.

"Will the doctor be all right?" she asked.

"The disguise will hold unless he removes the watch. I told him to spout physics babble at them and keep them confused for as long as he can. He's helped as much as he can here." Megamind answered. Roxanne looked up and saw Wayne standing there.

"You came back." She said.

"Yeah...your buddy there makes a convincing argument." He gestured at iBot, who _bowwed_ happily. She went to Wayne and hugged him too, finally forgiving him.

"Thank you." She said.

"Okay you two. I love a happy ending as much as the next man but this isn't the ending." Megamind interrupted. Roxanne's high spirits sank a little, reminded of their impending doom. She glanced up at the monitor. They a little over 21 hours left. That didn't seem so bad.

"What happens now?" she asked. The space shuttle was completed and the weapon was operational.

"Now we mount the weapon to the spacecraft and get the thing launched." He said. Roxanne eyed the shuttle. It looked a little like a Transformer.

"Are you sure that thing can actually fly?" she asked.

"Of course, I've used it many times. How do you think we built the Death Ray?" he asked.

"I crushed the shuttle once." Wayne said. "It looks way better now."

"It's safe. It separates into two parts plus two escape pods programmed to return straight home. Trust me. It can handle this job." He patted the shuttle affectionately. A brainbot came and wiped his fingerprints off the metal plate. Roxanne had to trust him. There was no alternative.

"Great. So when can we launch?" she asked. Megamind raised an eyebrow.

"We?" he asked.

"Yeah, _'we'_. Getting the old gang back together again, we'll nail this thing!"

"Firstly, as 'the old gang' I was constantly trying to destroy you both. Secondly, you're staying here."

"But it's _safe_." She mimicked him.

"I don't sound like that. And there's no room for all of us." He said.

"I do take up a lot of space." Said Wayne.

'I'm coming. With a camera. I'm reporting on this, it's my story."

"No Roxanne." Roxanne glared at the two of them, the hulking bearded Wayne and the alien with his jaw jutting out in that stubborn way of his.

"I'm coming. And you can't stop me." She said quietly.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

Megamind knelt in front of Roxanne as Wayne loaded their luggage on the shuttle.

"I know you're upset, Roxanne but it really is better for everyone this way. You've had no training or conditioning to be in space. The shuttle is really only equipped for two anyway and I need Wayne to help me with this." He watched the large man walk up the shuttle's ramp with a box of snacks. He was more than grateful for Wayne's help, but who he _really_ needed (_wanted_) was Minion. He sighed. "There's no need to worry about us. We'll be back in no time, safe and sound and you'll have the exclusive. Won't that be good?" he asked.

Roxanne glared at him. Perhaps she felt left out. She may have been certainly worried about them. Maybe she felt she was being patronised. Or it could have been the thick ropes tying her to Megamind's chair in the lab that were making her angry. She tried to say something that Megamind knew was less than complementary but she was muffled by the gag. He sighed. There was so much more he wanted to say. He was acutely aware of the little velvet-covered box in his pocket. He gazed into Roxanne's eyes glinting with furious tears and reluctantly decided that no, this wasn't the time. It was better left un-asked.

He wouldn't have been able to understand if it was a 'yes' or a 'no' through the gag anyway.

"Megamind? The shuttle's loaded. Want me to take it outside?" Wayne called. Megamind looked over at him. He was dressed in Minion's space-suit

"Yes thanks Wayne." He said. Wayne came over.

"Sorry about this Roxy. I've never tied anyone up before. Don't take it personally; we just don't want you getting hurt."

"The brainbots are under instructions to let you go once we've lifted off." Megamind said. "It will only be for a few minutes." She looked away from him.

"See you later Roxanne." Wayne went over to the shuttle, picked it up from underneath and carried it out of the huge access-door on the other side of the lab.

Megamind looked down in dismay at Roxanne, not wanting to leave her like this. But he had to play it cool or else she would start to realise just how dangerous this was going to be.

"So I guess I'm sleeping on the couch when I get back, huh?" He remarked. She looked back at him and gave a firm nod. He smiled in spite of the situation. He bent down and kissed her cheek.

"I love you Roxanne." He said. iBot, hovering unnoticed beside Bitey in the corner, in the meantime had started playing mood music.

_Don't wanna close my eyes,_

_I don't wanna fall asleep 'coz I'd miss you Baby,_

_And I don't wanna miss a thing._

'_Cause even when I dream of you,_

_The sweetest dream would never do..._

"iBot I swear I will use you for target practice if you don't _shut up_!" Megamind roared. Aerosmith was _not_ needed here!

Wayne, overhearing from outside, chuckled to himself. _Armageddon_. How fitting. He looked up at the shuttle, knowing he was about to find out just how indestructible he was...or wasn't.

Once Megamind and Wayne had left the lab and sounded far enough away to risk acting, Roxanne easily slipped out of the ropes she had actually untied about five minutes ago. She pulled the gag out of her mouth and chuckled, pleased at her own performance.

"Megamind, if you want something done right, do it yourself." She said quietly. Wayne may be possessed of infinite power and superhuman strength but he knew nothing about tying knots, and she had been escaping from Megamind's expert kidnappings for years now. Bitey hovered over to her.

[[Mommy?]] it _bowwed_. Seeing Mommy tied up and left in a chair by Daddy again after all this time had confused the pink brainbot. Roxanne stroked its dome.

"It's okay Bitey. You and Mommy have some place we need to be." She said. She took her cell phone out of her pocket, slipped her hands-free piece over her ear and dialled Carl's number as she made her way to the access door and peered out. The shuttle was still sitting there waiting to launch with Megamind nowhere in sight. She grinned to herself.

The call was picked up.

"Roxanne? I've been trying to call you all morning! What the hell is happening over at your house? Newman said you kicked him out!" Carl roared. "He works for this network too you know!"

"Carl. I'm about to have a huge story for you. I'll have my brainbot stream the signal live to the broadcast tower." She whispered as she checked the coast was clear one last time.

"How huge is 'huge'?" Carl asked.

"That black hole you had me reporting about? It's real. We've got less than twenty hours left unless Megamind saves the day – and I'm tagging along." She answered. Carl swore.

"Okay. Keep in touch I'll make sure everyone knows your broadcasts get shown live. Get as much footage as you can."

"Of course."

"You're the best Roxy!" Carl said.

"I know." She answered and hung up. Bitey hovered beside her.

She ran up the ramp into the shuttle. She looked around and found a door. It was to a storage cupboard, not far from the cockpit. Perfect, she thought. There were some cleaning implements, oxygen tanks, water bottles and airsick bags among other miscellaneous items.

[[Mommy?]] Roxanne opened up Bitey's panel in the back and switched her glow from pink to blue. Bitey _bowwed_ in protest.

"I know, but you need to blend in with the others. There's only a few brainbots on board and Megamind will recognise you if you're pink. You can't let Daddy know we're here. Okay?" Bitey 'blinked' her glowing red eye. Roxanne programmed some numbers into her keypad.

"I'm going to need you to be my camera-bot and broadcast on this frequency straight to the network. Oh, and I need some live-feed from the cockpit without Megamind or Wayne noticing. Can you do that?" Bitey made a noise that sounded like a raspberry.

[[Of course.]] it said in its own language. Roxanne smiled, getting the gist of it. Suddenly the shuttle began to vibrate.

"One minute until launch." Minion's cheerful pre-recorded voice boomed through the shuttle. Roxanne's stomach lurched.

It all became real. She was going into _space!_ In the storage cupboard of a shuttle without even a seatbelt dressed in skirt, a jacket and heels. She gulped and hoped she hadn't just made the biggest mistake of her life.

"Twenty seconds! Make sure your seatbelts are fastened and your seats are in their upright positions. It's going to be a bumpy ride!" Minion's voice said. Roxanne sat curled in the foetal position with her arms locked tight around Bitey who was _bowwing_ nervously.

"Ten, nine, eight, seven..." Roxanne squeezed her eyes shut and couldn't help but scream when the countdown hit 'one'.

Nobody heard her. The roar of the engines drowned out the sound.

Roxanne didn't know how long the nightmarish journey out of the Earth's atmosphere lasted. She clung desperately to consciousness knowing that if she passed out she may well miss the story of a lifetime (not to mention the end of existence) but the g-force was excruciating and she would periodically be knocked from one end of the storage cupboard.

Finally through her red haze of pain she realised the turbulence had stopped, and she was floating.

Her first action was to grab an airsick bag and vomit up the dinner she'd eaten on the flight from Switzerland. The dinner hadn't tasted all that good the first time around. Bitey _bowwed_ and hovered over her.

"I'm okay, I'm okay." Roxanne lied and took a few deep breaths. She helped herself to a water bottle (she now understood why all the equipment was bolted to the floor or walls), swirled it away in her mouth and then spat it into her airsick bag. She sealed it and stuffed it into a bin. She wiped her mouth, wishing for a mint. "I've got to report in to Carl." Bitey _bowwed_, this time sounding disapproving. "Come on Bitey, You said you'd help me. Please?" Bitey made a noise that sounded like a mechanical sigh and extended her arm, brushing Roxanne's hair out of her face and straightening her clothes. Its eye looked her up and down and it bobbed in approval. "Okay, let's get this started."

Bitey counted down (_boww, boww, bow)_. Roxanne drew in another deep breath, ever the professional reporter even in the worst situations.

"Metro City, this is Roxanne Ritchie. I'm reporting to you tonight from a space craft heading out of our solar system. Our mission: To save the universe."

_ Best. Introduction. Ever. _

She continued her story.

Wayne watched Megamind, Hero of Metro City and the universe's only hope in the face of certain doom hurl his breakfast into an airsick bag. He shook his head.

"You're like the worst alien ever, you know that?"

"I don't like space travel." Megamind moaned. Despite being strapped into the pilot's seat in a fairly comfortable cockpit the zero-gravity always did a number on his stomach. Wayne looked out into space. He hadn't been out of the Earth's atmosphere since he crash-landed as a toddler. It was strangely beautiful out there.

Except for the black vortex of doom and surrounding pink swirl of dust they were heading towards, anyway. It was probably visible from Earth by now from the night-side. It wasn't far from their solar system.

"Can this thing go any faster?" he asked. Megamind (now more green than blue) sealed his airsick bag and placed it into a bin beside his chair, seemingly placed there for that very purpose.

"Of course. Firing rear engines...now." he hit some buttons and they began really moving.

"This is quite a machine you know." Wayne looked around the cockpit. "You built this alone?"

"Minion helped. We stole most of the design from NASA. I just tweaked it a bit." Megamind said. A brainbot hovered in and started cleaning the cockpit, looking around curiously. Wayne smiled. It was kinda cute with that spiky fin on top, just like Roxy's pink bot.

Megamind shifted around a bit trying to relieve the pain of something digging into his side. He delved into his pocket and brought out the hard little velvet box. He opened it and sighed. Wayne looked at the sparkly diamond.

"You really should have given that to her before we left." He said.

"How? Her hands were tied behind her back." Megamind put the ring away. By all rights he should just throw it into the bin with the airsick bag. He wasn't going to get to use it now anyway, but instead he put it back in his pocket, letting it dig in and remind him of the girl he had left behind. Wayne was looking at him.

"You should have told her we weren't coming back. It's not fair to make her wait."

"It would have made it worse. I did leave her a note with iBot. Anyway, we don't know for sure..." Megamind stopped at the deadpan look Wayne was giving him. "Okay. All right I'll admit the chances are slim." He looked out the window and saw the asteroid belt approaching. This was the tricky part. He grabbed the controls and started steering around them. At least it distracted him from his stomach, and their impending doom.

The beams from the weapon just weren't powerful enough. No matter how much power he gave them, in all the simulations he tried the only thing that worked on the cursed vortex was to overload the weapon's reactor and blow it up right in the opening. The timing had to be perfect too, or it would all be in vain.

Wayne opened up a tube of Pringles and started munching. The smell of the snacks made Megamind's stomach churn again.

"Must you?" he asked.

"What? If we're all going to die I sure as hell ain't dying hungry." Wayne let one float up and he caught it in his mouth.

"You know you don't have to be here. You can take one of the pods back to Earth. This ship only needs one pilot."

"And miss one hell of a pyrotechnics display? I don't think so." Wayne said around a mouthful of chips. Megamind smiled.

"You and I together at the end. Who would have thought?" Megamind commented. Wayne's laughter caused the Pringles to float out of the tube and around the cockpit. The smell of sour cream and onion grew stronger and Megamind's stomach heaved.

"Another sick bag. Storage cupboard." He gulped and tried to keep his hands on the controls as they dodged asteroids. "Now!"

"Coming right up...no pun intended." Wayne chuckled to himself, let himself out of his seatbelt and floated out of the cockpit. He opened the door to the store room...

There was Roxanne, bruised and battered, clinging to a bolted-down oxygen tank to keep from floating away. She was pale, almost white, and staring at him wide-eyed and terrified.

"Roxy? Whatcha doing here? Megamind's not going to be happy." He stopped when he saw the ear piece she was wearing, and remembered the hovering brainbot in the cockpit.

Bitey. He knew that brainbot looked familiar.

"You heard it all didn't you?" Wayne sighed. Roxanne slowly nodded.

"Wayne! The bag!" Megamind was calling desperately. Wayne grabbed an airsick bag from its packet and took her in his arms.

"Come on. He's going to want to talk to you once he's finished throwing up."


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

"ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND?" Megamind shouted. Roxanne flinched. "You could have been killed stowing away in there! And for what? A story?" Bitey hovered in for a close-up. No one had told it to stop filming. Megamind glared up at it. "And you! I am surprised at you! I created you and you go ahead and defy me?"

[[Mommy!]] Bitey _bowwed_ and zoomed protectively between them. Megamind pointed his leather-clad finger at it, all the while still dodging asteroids with the other hand.

"You're supposed to be keeping _Mommy_ safe, at home!" he shouted. Bitey didn't like being shouted at. Its red eye focused on his finger and it snapped its powerful metallic jaws.

Megamind screamed and tried to shake it off. The shuttle jerked wildly from side to side.

"I think we all need to sit. Calm down. Talk this through." Wayne said reasonably as Megamind swore and tried to shake the angrily _bowwing_ bot off his hand while Roxanne started hyperventilating from the stress of it all. He handed Roxanne an airsick bag to breathe into and yanked the brainbot off Megamind's hand. It had a chunk of black leather still clamped in its jaws. "You. Out." He tossed the brainbot out of the cockpit. "You. Drive." He pointed at Megamind. "Right. Now. What are we going to do about this?" he asked. Roxanne pulled the bag away from her mouth.

"We're all going home. Right now. There has to be another way to –,"

"There isn't." Megamind cut her off. "Do you think I take on suicide missions lightly? There is no other way to destroy the vortex."

"Set the thingy to explode by remote. Activate the self destruct sequence!" Roxanne said. Megamind stared at his girlfriend.

"What do you think this is, the _Starship Enterprise_? There is no self-destruct sequence and I'm sorry but this particular model of custom-built laser _didn't_ _come with a remote control!_" he shouted.

"Can't you _make_ a remote control? You've made all that stupid stuff! Killer robot sheep! The Death Ray. Thinking flying robots with brains and _a gorilla suit for a talking fish for God's sake! Can't you make one crappy remote control for this one thing?_" she screamed.

Roxanne was breathing hard and Megamind was stunned to see tears in her eyes. It was only then he really saw her. Bruised, pale and a complete mess. He slumped.

"A remote control can't work. Phenomena like this cause a time dilation. It would be impossible for me to time the explosion right from a safe distance away." He needed her to himself. Right now. "I'm sorry, Roxanne. Way-en, here, you drive." Megamind passed control over to the co-pilot's station and got up.

"Hey wait a second!" Wayne hurriedly sat down and took the controls. "How do you do this? Oh...wait...wow I'm liking this."Megamind had designed the controls to be basically idiot-proof. "Come on. We need to talk." He said to Roxanne and took her wrist. He pulled her out of the cockpit and closed the door behind him.

Megamind wrapped his arms around Roxanne and held her close. She hugged him tightly. It was difficult and slightly awkward in the zero gravity of space but they made the best of it.

"I can't believe you just left me there." Roxanne said. "You told me you were coming back!"

"I lied." He said simply. "What would you have done if I'd told you the truth?" Roxanne thought about it. _Argue. Shout. Scream. Cry. Escape and sabotage the shuttle, dooming the Earth to destruction..._

"I would have tried to stop you."

"And you probably would have succeeded." Megamind admitted.

"So what happens now?" Roxanne asked, not really wanting to know the answer. Megamind stroked her hair and gave them a slight push away from the ceiling which had become uncomfortably close.

"You get into an escape pod with Bitey and leave. You win an Emmy for the story that Bitey is recording as we speak." He glared at the brainbot who hovered guiltily in the corner. "And you take care of Minion for me."

"And if I don't co-operate?" she asked. The fight wasn't really in her, Megamind could tell, but she had to go through the motions.

"Then I get Wayne to hold you down while _I_ tie the knots this time." He answered.

Roxanne knew she had lost this one. She gazed into his brilliant green eyes and couldn't help herself this time. She cried like a baby.

"It's not fair." She whispered and clung to him. She felt something hard dig into her hip. She couldn't help but laugh through the tears. "Really, Megamind?"

"That's not me!" he protested, purple-faced. Although one last time wouldn't be such a bad thing..._no! Bad Megamind_, he thought to himself. He sighed. "It's this. You should have it. Take it with you to remember me by." He dug the little velvet-covered box out of his pocket and handed it to Roxanne. Her eyes grew wide and sorrowful as she opened it. The diamond was the size of her thumbnail and had the faintest blue tint to it. It was beautiful. She closed the lid.

"Why didn't you ask me?" she asked. Megamind thought back on all the missed opportunities.

"The timing never felt right." He said, and left it at that. He couldn't ask her now.

Roxanne kissed his lips and wrapped her arms around him. There they stayed locked together until finally Wayne cleared his throat from the cockpit doorway.

"We're passing coming up on Saturn now. I think it's about time you went home Roxy." He said. Megamind looked up. Yes. It was time.

Wayne swept Roxanne up in a gentle hug and they said their 'goodbyes' while Megamind packed some food and extra water into the escape pod. The landing coordinates were set for Metro City and all the lights were green. Megamind stroked Bitey's dome and switched her glow back to 'pink'. She _bowwed_ gratefully.

"Tell the others Daddy says goodbye. Take good care of Mommy and Uncle Minion." He said. Bitey bobbed up and down and waited in the pod.

Megamind took Roxanne's hand and helped her into the escape pod. There was nothing more either of them could say. Once she was strapped in he brushed his hand against her face one last time and hit the button on the outside of the pod. Minion's recorded voice boomed out from a speaker.

"Escape pod activated. Thirty seconds to launch. Never mind sir, we'll get him next time!" Megamind sighed. He hadn't thought to change the programmed messages from the old days. Roxanne blew him a kiss through the window and shut her eyes.

"Ten seconds. Nine, eight, seven..." Megamind watched as the pod disengaged from the shuttle, drifted for a few seconds and then the blue engines flared to life, heading straight back to Earth.

And with that, she was gone.

He drew in a ragged breath, exhaled, and looked towards the cockpit. He had a universe to save. Wayne put his huge arm around Megamind's shoulders.

"So now what's the plan? I don't want to alarm you or anything but Pluto just got sucked in" he said. Megamind shrugged.

"It's not even a planet anymore. No one will miss it." He looked at the doorway to the second pod. "You can still go home, Way-en. It's not too late. I can handle the rest by myself."

"Negative, Little Buddy. I'm here until the end. Now what's the plan?" Megamind smiled at the thought of himself and Metro Man here together at the end.

"Okay. We steer to the vortex. Just as we reach the mouth we activate the laser. I cross the red and green wires and the rest is history." Megamind checked the countdown. They had 34 minutes left. Judging from the view through the cockpit window they would have just enough time to get it all done.

"Okay so fly to the mouth, activate laser, cross the wires and _kaboom_."

"Affirmative." Megamind clapped him on the arm and turned back to the cockpit. "Let's get going!"

"Negative, Little Buddy." Before Megamind could turn and ask him what the problem was he felt a sharp pain in the back of his head, and the world went dark.

Roxanne watched out the rear window of her escape pod. The shuttle had disappeared from view a while ago but she could still see the swirling black and pink vortex. It was sort of pretty in its own way. It was hard to believe this thing was capable of destroying the whole universe.

She looked down at her watch. According to the count-down the vortex had to be closing within the next few minutes.

She knew Megamind would do it. Right at the last moment the thing would snap shut and the whole thing would be over.

And Megamind would be gone.

She watched. Time felt like it had slowed to a crawl and each second felt like minutes. Finally the alarm she had set on her watch started beeping. 0 minutes, 0 seconds...

The vortex was still there.

She watched, dismayed. The minutes crawled by.

Finally, almost an hour past the deadline, there was massive, slow-motion explosion surrounded by swirls of blue and white light. The swirls reached out to lap the edges of the pink dust cloud from the centre of the vortex. Roxanne watched as fresh tears welled up in her eyes.

He was gone.

The bright blast stayed there much longer than she thought it possibly could and she watched the vortex, holding her breath.

It stayed exactly as it was.

She watched. She thought she could see the occasional swirl of blue or white light playing around the opening of the hole but she wasn't sure. Did it look smaller? No. She looked down at her watch after a while. It was well over the hour deadline. And the damned thing wasn't going anywhere. She hugged Bitey to her chest.

It was all in vain after all.

She looked down at the little brainbot and sighed.

"Come on Bitey. We have one last job to do." She combed her hair with her fingers, wiped her eyes and tried to look as professional as she could for the last and biggest story of her life. "Count me in." She said to Bitey, who started recording. The vortex was clearly visible in the background of the shot through the rear window.

"_Boww, boww, boww_." Roxanne drew in a deep breath.

"Citizens of Metro City, as you can see this dull black void in the universe is pulling us closer and we're completely defenceless against it..."

Roxanne finished her story and slumped back n her seat. They zoomed towards the Earth. Roxanne shut her eyes, willing herself to sleep so she didn't have to stare at the pink and black drain-hole of doom anymore. She stayed in a miserable on and off doze for the rest of the journey.

Bitey settled in and kept filming through the back window. No one had told it to stop. It didn't really understand what was going on, only that the black and pink swirly thing was a bad thing, and that Daddy was meant to be taking care of it. When the hole started to shrink, and finally disappeared leaving a glowing pink haze behind Bitey didn't really think much of it. It just kept on filming and broadcasting the way it was meant to.

Roxanne stayed in her doze until the pod started shaking. She opened her eyes and wished she hadn't.

Earth was taking up the whole view out of the front window and was getting closer by the second. There was a faint orange-ish glow coming off the front of the pod as they re-entered the atmosphere.

"Bitey?" she said nervously. Bitey bobbed up and down and made a noise that sounded like 'Wheeeee!" Roxanne gripped the arm rest of her seat and stared as they sped towards the United States. They slowed their descent and started flying parallel to the ground over the ocean and Roxanne could see Metro City in the distance, getting closer. She wondered where they would come down. They flew past New Not Evil Lair on the coast and dodged buildings until they came to the rougher part of town. _Oh no_. She knew where they were landing.

There it was. Metro City Penitentiary.

The pod slowed a little but not enough to stop before it hit the fence. Suddenly Roxanne was surrounded by white airbags that obscured her view and she was jolted by an impact, and another, and another.

Finally the pod came to a halt. The airbags deflated and Minion's voice came through the speakers of the pod.

"Thank you for flying _Air Megamind_, we hope you have a pleasant day!" The airbags finished retracting and the front of the pod opened up.

Roxanne looked outside and screamed. Dozens of men in orange jumpsuits were rushing at her.

No, not at her. _Past_ her. Through the holes the pod had put in the outer fence, the inner fence and the walls of the prison itself. Inmates cheered as they escaped.

_What the?_ Roxanne unbuckled herself and stood shakily. Now she was surrounded by guards with weapons drawn. An older man with a moustache was storming towards her.

"Damnit Megamind what the hell are you doing here?" he shouted, and then blinked. "Roxanne Ritchie?"

"Warden?" she guessed. She had never met the man but from the description Megamind had given her this had to be him. As for her...well she _was_ the most famous reporter in Metro City.

"What are you doing here? We saw your story...are you alright?" she fell and he caught her in his arms. "Come and sit down." He started to lead her out of the ruined common room when they heard more crashing noises coming from outside.

Roxanne looked up and screamed as another pod crashed through the wall. The guards, the Warden and Roxanne all dove out of the pod's path. It came to rest right next to hers.

It was too much. Roxanne fainted.


	9. Chapter 9

So yes, I left you on a bit of a cliffhanger, but at least I didn't leave you there for long

Thanks for all the positive feedback you've been leaving. Especially LasersAndSpikes, I love your work!

Disclaimer: I don't own Megamind. But I spend more time writing his fan fiction than a normal person really should...

Chapter 9

Wayne held the limp body of his little blue buddy over one arm.

"Sorry Megamind. You're going to have one hell of a headache when you wake up." He said as he opened up the second escape pod. He dumped Megamind into the seat and strapped him in. He recited the plan again, wishing he had a pen and paper. "Fly to the mouth, activate laser, cross the wires and _kaboom"_

"Kabooooom." Megamind mumbled senselessly.

"Kaboom. That's right!" Wayne said and checked the pod. There were a few packets of potato chips, a five litre tank of water under the seat and all the lights were green. "All systems are go Little Buddy." He looked down at the sleeping former megalomaniac. "Have a great life. Take good care of Roxy. And say 'goodbye' to Fish Dude and iBot." He said.

"iBot. Damned pain in the ass." Megamind slurred. Wayne smiled and hit the 'eject' button.

The pod drifted as Roxanne's did, then the engines engaged and it zipped away towards home.

Wayne watched him go and made his way back to the cockpit.

"Fly to the mouth, activate laser, cross the wires and _kaboom" _he repeated. He sat down and looked at the controls on the pilot's station. "Huh." He said to himself. "So where are the controls for the laser?"

He realised he probably should have gotten more information out of Megamind before sending him home. He had been expecting a big red button labelled 'Laser'

_Think_, he told himself. Where did Megamind put the laser? Duh! It was mounted on the outside of the shuttle.

_What do you think this is? The Starship Enterprise?_ He head Megamind's voice echo in his head. It most certainly was not. It was a last-minute improvisation of an obsolete NASA shuttle.

Wayne looked down at himself. He was already wearing Minion's space suit. He just needed to find the helmet and figure out how to exit the shuttle.

The shuttle was approaching the mouth of the vortex. The sight of it sent a chill down his spine. He didn't remember much of his journey from his own world, but he did remember the sight of the pink and black swirling void. He'd thought it was pretty when he was a baby. He slowed the shuttle's approach and locked in a steady course to the mouth of the void.

The helmet was under the seat. After fitting it and attaching the oxygen tanks and water supply (not that he'd be around long enough to get thirsty, he thought to himself) Wayne made his way to the back of the shuttle, toolkit in hand, and floated into the airlock.

He didn't bother tethering himself to the shuttle. He could fly after all, and fly he did. He couldn't resist. He'd never flown in space before. There was no wind resistance, no gravity, nothing to slow him down. He zipped around the shuttle a few times and even ventured closer to the vortex for a closer look.

_ Whoa!_

He could feel the immense gravity of the thing pulling him in, and had to increase his speed to get away from it. Shaken, he flew back to the shuttle.

"Right. Back to work." He said to himself. He opened up the panel on the laser device and found the 'on' switch, and the two wires he needed to cross. He was passing Neptune now, approaching the mouth.

For the first time in his life he felt afraid.

Still, there was nothing to be done about it. He stared down the gaping black mouth and looked around. He felt the gravity take hold of him and the shuttle. He turned and aimed his eye-lasers at the engines of the shuttle. The Vortex would pull it in; it didn't need its engines anymore.

Now was the time. He flicked the 'on' switch. A little status bar appeared as the machine warmed up.

"Warming up? You've got to be kidding me." He growled. He looked up at the gaping vortex above him. He could feel the pressure build up all over his body and knew that a human would have been crushed by the gravity by now. The status bar was at 50%. "Come on, come on. Hurry up." It paused. "Come on!" It slowly started rising, and paused again. "Damn you Megamind! If you were here I'd throw you into the black hole myself!" he shouted. 90%...91%... They were right inside the mouth now. Wayne began pulling the shuttle backwards, trying to slow it down. 100%! Blue and white beams of light spiralled out of the end of the weapon into the mouth of the vortex.

He cut the red and green wires, stripped the plastic insulation back and took a few deep breaths. The count-down reached one-minute.

He wasn't interested in the drama of it all. One minute was cutting it close enough for him. He thought of his friends back home one more time and twisted the wires together.

The weapon started to shudder and spark, and then it exploded, taking the shuttle with it. Brilliant blue and white lights danced around the edge of the vortex and it started to shrink. The intense gravity started to get painful and Wayne felt his head was about to implode.

So this is pain, he thought to himself. The toughened glass of his helmet started to crack.

_ Oh crabnuggets._


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10

Roxanne opened her eyes and found herself in what looked like a hospital. She was in a tiny curtained-off area with a heart monitor attached to her finger. She was wearing a paper gown under the thin cotton blanket.

"Hello?" she called out. The curtain moved and a man wearing a uniform stepped inside. Roxanne blinked. A prison guard?

Everything came rushing back to her. But wasn't the world supposed to end? And...

"The pod! The second pod! Who was in it?" She sat up too fast and her head spun.

"Um, I don't know if I'm the right person to..." the nervous young guard began babbling.

"WHO WAS IT?" She shouted and sat up. The curtain moved again.

"Miss Ritchie? Please calm down. It was Megamind." An older man said as he stepped inside. Followed by Bitey and ...

Roxanne leapt out of bed, sending the heart monitor crashing to the floor as she threw herself into his arms and kissed him fiercely. He patted her shoulder awkwardly.

"There there...Miss Ritchie." He said in a strangely accented voice. Roxanne pulled away. The Warden cleared his throat.

"This is not Megamind. This is...well we're not sure who he is. We've known he wasn't Megamind for a while now but he refused to drop his little charade until he spoke to either you or that big blue pain in my ass. Megamind is still asleep."

"Oh." Roxanne blushed. "Sorry."

"Oh no apology necessary. So long as my wife doesn't find out." Dr. Finlayson said. He moved the face on his watched and morphed back into his own short, balding, ageing self still wearing pyjamas and a dressing gown. "It's true then? The blue man destroyed the black hole?"

"He did?" Roxanne's brain blanked out. "But it was still there. An hour past the deadline it was still there."

"Time dilation, Miss Ritchie. It was gone, but it looked like it was still there from this far away."

"Oh." She had no idea what he was talking about but decided to take his word for it. She turned to the Warden.

"Where's Megamind?" she asked. He opened the curtain on the other side of her bed.

"The doctor says he'll be fine but with that huge brain a concussion knocks him out for a while."

Roxanne stared, barely able to believe it was him. He was pale against the white cotton blanket. His eyes were squeezed shut as though his sleep was not a peaceful one and he was on a heart monitor too. She checked both of his wrists for hologram watches before she would believe it was really him. Bitey hovered over to take a look and Roxanne patted it absently.

"How?" she asked. The Warden shrugged.

"He was passed out when he crash-landed, he hasn't said anything. We were hoping you could tell us what happened. We've all seen your broadcast, by the way. That's how we knew the world wasn't ending." Bitey must have kept filming it long after Roxanne had lost hope. She smiled. "Was there anyone else with Megamind?" she asked.

"That hairy man from the broadcast? No. He was alone." Roxanne's spirits sank. _Oh_ _Wayne_. "Who was he anyway? He looked familiar."

"Someone Megamind hired to help him out while Minion was away." Roxanne lied.

"Okay. Well, he didn't come back." Roxanne nodded, blinking back tears again. But _he_ was here. Her Megamind was alive and asleep in the bed beside hers in...

She couldn't help but laugh. They were in the infirmary of Metro City Penitentiary. She kissed Megamind and gently pressed her forehead to his before turning to the Warden.

"Are my clothes around?" she asked. The back of the paper gown was feeling a bit breezy. She blushed when she realised she had been giving the Warden, the guard and Dr. Finlayson quite a show.

"They were...ahm...dirty. I sent them to the laundry. The guard put a jumpsuit on the end of your bed." The Warden said. "We'll leave you to get changed."

"Miss Ritchie. I have to go. I'm being sent back to Switzerland later on today." Dr. Finlayson said. She turned to him.

"Thank you for your help." She said. "They couldn't have done it without you."

"You're welcome." He said. "Next time, tell the blue man to just ask for my help instead of kidnapping me?" Roxanne smiled sadly.

"I know the feeling. Goodbye, Doctor."

Roxanne was given some private time in the infirmary shower. They even managed to find her a toothbrush (much to her relief) and she dressed in the orange jumpsuit of the inmates.

The prison was quiet. According to the guard most of the inmates escaped through the holes she and Megamind had made in the prison walls during their crash-landing. The landing sequence was obviously a relic of Megamind's villainous old days.

Once she was clean, dry and dressed she climbed into bed next to her boyfriend. The bed was small but neither of them was overly tall and he was so thin she managed to squeeze in comfortably. She arranged his arm around her, rested her head on his chest and lay there contentedly.

Megamind woke warm and comfortable with Roxanne snuggled up to him. He smiled sleepily and kissed the top of her head, as he often did in the mornings, and squeezed her tightly. She smelled good. She felt good too. He opened his eyes and looked down at her.

She was wearing an orange prison jumpsuit. Megamind frowned. Normally he was open to any kind of odd thing she wanted him to try out but a prison fantasy was something he didn't know she was into. He shifted around trying to relieve the pins and needles in the arm Roxanne was monopolising and his head started to throb. That was one hell of a knock Wayne had given him...

Wayne.

He sat bolt upright, almost knocking Roxanne off the bed.

"Roxanne? What happened? Roxanne!" he shouted. She regained her balance and sat up. She smiled down at him. His eyes were wide and panicked.

"Megamind! Calm down. We crash-landed in prison. The vortex is gone." He slumped back and stared up at the ceiling. _How_? "What happened up there?" she asked.

"He hit me. I think." He felt the back of his head gingerly. There was swelling there. "I don't remember anything else."

"He must have put you in the escape pod." Megamind stared up at the ceiling.

"Fly to the mouth, activate laser, cross the wires and _kaboom" _he said to himself. "He must have been planning this all along."

"Probably. He really cared about you." She gently stroked his face.

"And the vortex?" he asked. Roxanne nodded.

"It's gone, there's only a dust cloud left." He shook his head. _Thank you, Wayne. _The world was safe. But now he was gone. Again. Only this time Megamind hadn't just lost a worthy opponent, he'd lost a friend. He sighed and Roxanne kissed him, long and slow, then was surprised when she pulled away.

"You still taste like vomit. Go and shower!"

Megamind showered and brushed his teeth. He changed into a familiar orange jumpsuit and met up with Roxanne in the mess hall for some lunch (prison-grade mystery meat casserole and mashed potato). It wasn't there most spectacular date, but it wasn't their worst either. At least he wasn't disguised as Bernard.

The Warden met them as they were finishing eating. He didn't have much to do at the moment now all of his prisoners had escaped.

"Miss Ritchie" His tone turned from friendly to icy. "Megamind." Megamind looked up at the man.

"Admit it. You missed me." He gave him a smug grin. The Warden glared.

"Like a hole in the head. You're supposed to be the good guy now and you're still causing me trouble!"

"Relax. Once I'm out I'll round up your prisoners for you."

"Who says you're leaving? Do you have any idea how much this damage is going to cost the city?"

"I just saved the universe from certain doom, I think they'll forgive me a few million dollars worth of equipment and building damage." The Warden crossed his arms.

"You're a villain."

"You have missed me haven't you?" Roxanne smiled as she watched them banter back and forth. If the other inmates were Megamind's 'uncles' then this had to be the 'dad'. Once they had exhausted their arguments the Warden sat down at the table next to Roxanne.

"There's a media circus outside. That broadcast of yours didn't cut off until after you landed and once the news got out that nearly all the inmates in the prison had escaped through the hole in the wall everyone put two and two together." Roxanne shook her head. A tiny part of her wanted to be part of it and report on the rest of the story. The rest of her decided to take the day off. "There's a back entrance we use for high-profile court-cases and the like, I can sneak you both out of there if you want." _Good to know_, thought Roxanne, and filed that information away for the future. Megamind shook his head and winced as his head started to throb again.

"I'll go deal with it. Is there any Tylenol?" he asked.

"I'll send a guard to the infirmary. Are you ready to leave?" Megamind turned to Roxanne.

"Want a tour before we leave? I can show you my old cell." He offered.

"Um, no, I wouldn't if I were you." The Warden said. Megamind looked at him and the man sighed. "We put Hal Stewart in there to keep him away from the other inmates. They weren't too happy with him for trying to kill their little blue nephew. Anyway, he's...redecorated." He glanced at Roxanne and looked away. The walls were plastered with posters of her, as well as some fairly graphic graffiti that he had removed again and again but Hal kept on replacing them. "I might get the guards to clean it up while he's gone actually."

"Hal's gone?" Roxanne asked, surprised and a little unnerved.

"He got out with the other inmates during exercise time." The Warden glared back at Megamind. Megamind nodded. The whole escapee thing had been a bit of a joke to him until he realised among his fairly harmless 'uncles' there were some bad people in prison.

"I'll get right on it." Megamind promised. He got up from the table.

"Oh and here are your things." The Warden said and passed them both a paper bag containing their clothes. Roxanne opened hers and felt around inside until she found the little black velvet box. She took it and dropped it into Megamind's bag. It didn't feel like it belonged to her yet.

Megamind did as he promised. On the way out of the prison he stood for nearly fifteen minutes in an impromptu press conference explaining the situation and answering questions. Roxanne stood next to the Warden at the police car assigned to take her and Megamind home. One reporter broke away from the rest and approached her.

Harry Newman. Flanked by his camera-person.

"Roxanne Ritchie. We all saw your live broadcast of the event. How does it feel being back on Earth safe and sound?" She stared at the ineffectual little man, but suddenly the fight wasn't in her anymore.

"It feels pretty damned good Harry. I didn't think we were going to make it back in one piece."

"Did you really think Mega Man was dead?" She bit down an angry retort.

"Yes. Yes I did. It was the worst moment of my life."

"What are your plans now the universe isn't ending?" She smiled.

"I think I'll take some leave, relax a bit. You'll be right to handle Metro City's news on your own for a while won't you?" she asked sweetly. He grinned.

"I might be willing to help you out Miss Ritchie. Well folks, you heard it here first. Our exclusive interview with Roxanne Ritchie, safe and sound and happy to be home. Back to you Kevin."

"Chris." Roxanne hissed.

"Back to you Chris!" he said cheerfully. Roxanne sighed. They may lose some ratings while she was away but damned if she cared right now, she was taking a break.

Back home they were greeted at the front door by an army of brainbots all _bowwing_ excitedly at them. They zoomed around their Mommy and Daddy all wanting pats and attention. Even Bitey was surrounded by her blue counterparts all listening intently as she _bowwed_ the details of their adventure.

Last to approach them was iBot. Roxanne's face fell when she saw him hovering there all alone looking around with his red eye.

[[Music Man?}} He _bowwed_. Roxanne didn't understand the words but knew what he had asked.

"He didn't come home, iBot." She said, patting his dome.

"He said to tell you 'goodbye'." Megamind remembered at the sight of the white modified brainbot. He stroked the brainbot's dome and it made a _booo-ing_ sound. "I'm sorry iBot.". It _booo-ed_ again and floated away softly playing _Space Oddity_ by David Bowie. Roxanne watched him float away and Megamind squeezed her shoulders. "Come on. Let's go inside."

It felt strange to do normal things like make coffee and sit on the couch. Megamind turned on the TV to relax but of course their story was on every network. Roxanne cringed at the sight of herself on the screen. Her hair was a mess. She was pale and bruised with smudged makeup and what looked like a vomit-stain on the collar of her blouse.

"Oh God! Everyone is seeing that aren't they?" she moaned. Megamind watched the screen wide-eyed, trying to think of something positive to say.

"Um...well you did a great job! You sound fantastic." He said.

"Turn it off. Ugh!" she covered her eyes in despair until he switched the screen off. When she looked up again he was gazing at her with a small smile on his face. "What?' she said. He leaned in and kissed her.

"I'm just glad we're here." He said and kissed her again. Roxanne stroked the back of his head and his back.

"Mmm." She was suddenly very aware of the fact they were finally alone, without any pressing matters they had to deal with. She ran her nails over the coarse fabric of his prison jumpsuit and he shivered and deepened the kiss. His fingers were gently tugging on her hair and next they had made their way to the buttons on the front of her jumpsuit. His lips were on her throat then and pulling her suit down over her shoulders when...

_ Knock knock knock. _

"Helloooo? Anybody home?" Roxanne growled in frustration. Megamind's eyes widened and he looked up.

"_Wayne?_" he said excitedly. Then his face fell.

"Well no, sir, but I'll take that as a compliment on my excellent physique." Minion said cheerfully. Roxanne hastily buttoned herself back up again and Megamind sat back on the couch. He hadn't realised he was still holding onto hope until then. "Might I remind you that we agreed the lounge area is designated an intimacy-free zone?"

"A what?" Roxanne asked.

"Only while you're in the country. You weren't due back until next week." Megamind stood up and smiled. In spite of everything it was good to see the fish again.

"I heard you had some excitement so we came home early." Minion said. Shiyounin came in behind him.

"Saving universe now Mega Mind? You will be needing pay rise, yes?" she asked. Megamind immediately went over to her and planted a kiss on her dome. Roxanne smiled. If this were any other woman on Earth she would be insanely jealous of the open flirtations between them, but seeing how Shiyounin was a fish in a robotic suit she felt she could handle it. She went to Minion and hugged him.

"It's good to see you Minion." She said.

"I get that you're going for realism but isn't this a bit much?" Megamind looked Shiyounin up and down. She was wearing a floral dress over her white enamel suit and her normally streamlined look was punctuated by two very round and quite large breasts in the appropriate places. She laughed prettily.

"It is surprise. Not sure how to get through customs so used deception." She and Minion shared a smile and then she reached into her bra and pulled out a glass sphere.

Inside was a sleeping fish. It looked like a tiny Minion except its scales were mostly white, and it didn't have teeth.

"Ohhhh." Roxanne looked at it, mouth hanging open. Minion reached in and retrieved a second sphere. This one was a white coi fish that looked just like its mother. This one was awake and looking around curiously. "Shiyounin! They're beautiful!"

Megamind was staring open-mouthed at the baby fish.

"How is that even possible?" he breathed. Megamind hadn't thought their DNA would have been compatible. Minion held up his baby girl proudly.

"We just gave it a try and here they are! This is Rei." He looked fondly at the little white coi, who smiled back at him. "And the sleepy head over there is Minion Junior." Megamind frowned.

"Weren't there more than two? When coi spawn they can have dozens of eggs..." he stopped when he saw Shiyounin blush.

"There were more. Shiyounin ate the rest before I could chase her out of the pond." Minion laughed at the memory. "I got these little guys safe and sound before she nabbed them too." Roxanne and Megamind both stared at the robot fish parents with identical weirded-out expressions. "It's a fish thing." Minion explained. Roxanne cleared her throat while Megamind gave an awkward laugh.

"Yeah...a fish thing."

"Tell us what happened here! We saw news story on aeroplane." Shiyounin changed the subject.

They all sat down together in the lounge sharing their stories. Roxanne held the little sphere containing the sleeping Minion Junior while Megamind filled them in on their adventures.

It was dark outside when Minion finally yawned and suggested he and his new family retreat to the pond out back. Roxanne watched them go with a smile on her face. Megamind stood and offered her his hand, then helped her to her feet. She linked her arm in his and they walked wordlessly upstairs. Roxanne closed the bedroom door and felt Megamind's arms circle around her waist from behind. She smiled when she felt his lips brush against the back of her neck and let out a happy sigh.

"Your thoughts, Miss Ritchie?" Megamind's lips were against her ear. A shiver ran down her spine and she turned to kiss him while his hands busied themselves at her buttons.

"I didn't think we'd ever be here all together again." She said. He yanked the top down over her shoulders and kissed down her neck.

"Neither did I." He confessed. Roxanne shut her eyes and gently grazed her nails over his scalp and stroked his ears in that way she knew drove him mad. Sure enough he grabbed her hips and pressed her up against the bedroom door. He paused for a moment.

"What is it?" she asked.

"This is about the time somebody is usually comes bursting into the room." He stood still as if listening intently. Roxanne rolled her eyes and shoved him backwards onto the bed, shedding the rest of her jumpsuit before climbing on top of him and saying;

"Not tonight Megamind."

Later, much later, sweaty and exhausted Megamind gazed down at Roxanne. She was a mess with mad hair and limbs tangled in sheets still breathing hard, once again laying on his arm and sending it to sleep. The ring was downstairs.

None of that mattered.

"Marry me?" He asked. She slowly smiled and kissed his lips.

"Yes!"

The next morning Megamind sat contentedly in the kitchen sipping his standard 8-sugar cup of coffee. Shiyounin and Roxanne looked to be having some girl-talk time in the lounge from the way they would stop talking every now and then and look over at their respective mates, giggle, and then continue. Shiyounin was very interested in Roxanne's engagement ring. It looked like Minion was going to have to go shopping soon.

"Here, hold this!" Minion thrust a glass sphere into Megamind's free hand. He looked down at the gummy little version of Minion and smiled. Minion Junior smiled back. It couldn't talk yet. It was only a week out of the egg after all but he was observing everything around him. Megamind cradled the sphere in one arm and watched Minion shake fish flakes into Rei's sphere. The little white coi hungrily gulped them down.

_Hmm. Offspring_. Megamind looked at Roxanne speculatively. Her head. His colouring. Eyes...blue or green it didn't matter. His intellect and her attitude...he smiled to himself. Roxanne noticed the look he was giving her and glanced down at the baby fish in his arm, putting two and two together.

"Nuh uh no way Megamind! I am too young to lose my figure to your gigantic-headed children!" she said. He paid no attention. He was busy picturing their little boy or girl with that same angry look on its face. "You hear me! No!"


	11. Chapter 11

Well here's the ending. Thanks to everyone for reading, I hope you've enjoyed it

Epilogue

Roxanne watched the news with Rei cradled in one arm. Day five of her vacation and she felt no need to return to work in the near future. That didn't stop her from tuning in every night and providing journalistic commentary to anyone who was in the room with her. After the second day Megamind, Minion and Shiyounin all learned quickly to stay out of the lounge between 6 and 7pm but Rei was a captive audience. She smiled up at Roxanne with her curious little eyes. She was very cute, Roxanne decided, but that did not increase her desire to breed in the near future, especially considering the possibility of a baby with Megamind's gigantic head...she shuddered.

Chris, the handsome but slightly plastic-looking anchor smiled into the camera.

"Good evening Metro City, I'm Chris Stephanovic and you are watching the six o'clock news."

"He uses the same opening every night." She said quietly to the tiny fish. Rei blinked and let out a bubble.

"Tonight's top story: The return of one of this city's greatest heroes, Wayne Scott, formerly known as Metro Man." Roxanne's jaw dropped.

"_Megamind! Get in here!_" she shouted, causing Rei to let loose a stream of bubbles. "Shhhh shhh shhh I'm sorry." She rocked the fish gently. Rei's lower lip quivered but she stopped crying. Megamind walked in cautiously.

"If this is another Harry Newman rant I'm going out for the rest of the night." He warned. She was staring at the screen. Of course, Harry Newman had the story.

"Yes Kevin. I'm standing here with Metro City's former hero, Metro Man. Metro Man, where have you been?" he asked. The camera switched to a shot of Wayne's face.

Roxanne gasped. Wayne was in a hospital bed. His hair was neat and his beard was trimmed but he looked terrible. He had dark circles under his eyes and he was very pale.

"Well Harvey, the truth is I don't really know where I was. I don't remember anything between getting hit with Megamind's death ray and yesterday when I woke up in an ambulance." Roxanne stared at Megamind.

"How...is this possible? How did he get back?"

"If anyone could survive the vortex he could." Megamind was wide-eyed.

"Have you heard there's a new hero in town?" Harry asked. Wayne managed a smile.

"Yeah I heard Megamind stepped up to the plate. I knew my little buddy would get there someday."

"So will we be seeing a Metro Man/Mega Man crime-fighting team in the near future?" Harry asked. Wayne shook his head.

"Well I'm kind of out of action for now Harry. My powers are gone from whatever did this to me. Maybe they'll be back, maybe they won't."

"What will you do now then?" Harry asked. Wayne lay back on the bed and smiled.

"Well recovery for a start. I don't know how I got in this condition but it's knocked me around. After that...Harry I've always loved music. And I've never had a chance to go anywhere with it. I spoke to Megamind earlier today and he's asked me to perform at his wedding."

"Wedding?" Harry interrupted. "You're saying there's a wedding?" Wayne flinched.

"Oops. I don't think I was meant to say anything about that..."

Roxanne raised her eyebrows t Megamind.

"Roxanne I swear this is the first I've heard of it." He held his hands up defensively, then began swearing at the television screen.

"What is it?" she asked.

"He doesn't have amnesia. He's lying through his teeth. Look at him!" Roxanne looked back at the television screen. He did have that awkward look on his face when he was trying to spin a story.

"I'm going to kill him. I am really, truly going to kill him." Megamind growled. Roxanne shook her head.

"Oh well...he's alive." She hugged Megamind.

"Not for long." He said but was cut off by iBot. He loudly started blaring music and bouncing around the house.

"Out!" Megamind shouted. iBot zoomed away, threw open the front door and floated off to Metro City Hospital to find his friend.

You didn't really think I'd kill him off did you? Hehehe.


End file.
